Jason

I've known Jason practically all of my life since we have been in the Wood River congregation since we were children. Growing up we never really did much together. He was into sports and I was into Star Wars so we never really clicked. He was a very brave kid - when I say "brave" perhaps it would be more appropriate to say "reckless". He was the kind of kid that always seemed to have a broken bone or crutches.

Thinking back I can only remember one time that he came over to my house when we were kids. (Of course there may have been other times, my memory is selective at times.) When we lived in Alton we didn't have a nice flat backyard, instead it was a steep hill. At the bottom of the hill was what we used to call "the pit". How can I describe it? Sort of like a sinkhole. So "the pit" was on one side and next to it there was a row of trees for the wooded area behind our house. I remember Jason came over one day and took my bike down the back hill - he had so much speed that he went crashing into the trees - he was lucky he didn't go over the edge into "the pit". Brave? Reckless? A little of both, no doubt.

Many years later there was a time in our life that Jason and his wife Teri really gave Rebekah and I a boost. It was during a time we were kind of down in spirit. One day we had just got done visiting an old friend that wasn't doing too well and we were sad and sort of moping around the house. Jason called us up out of the blue and asked if we wanted to come over to their house for a Watchtower study and also if we wanted to go with them to Sears as Jason had gotten a gift-certificate that he wanted to use to buy some tools. Now as I write this I know that this doesn't sound like a very fun way to spend an evening - but Rebekah and I really enjoyed ourselves and it made a bad day so much nicer. We appreciate that they took an interest in us.

It was around this time that Jason gave me some practical help. I had lost my job at Dial and was coming down on my last month of unemployment when Jason offered me a position at the company he worked for as a Lead Paint Remover technician. When winter rolled around and work was getting slow Jason got me a position working in the office. I'm still there today. It is such a great job and provides for my needs. I consider this job a blessing from Jehovah and I'm thankful to Jason that he helped me get it.

Rebekah and I have also gone on a couple of trips with Jason and Teri. They invited us to go canoeing with them a couple of times which was a really good time. On one trip Jason still proved to be just as brave/reckless as an adult as he was a child. There was this cliff that some people were base jumping off of so we climbed to the top. He didn't hesitate to run and jump off the cliff into the water. I on the other hand was paralysed with fear and questioned what in the world made me climb to the top of this cliff. I wanted to climb down but it was too dangerous - more so than jumping. .... and so I jumped and scared myself to death! Despite that it was a really fun time. Jason and his wife Teri are such enjoyable people to hang around with.

Another time I will never forget happened a little over a year ago. Rebekah and I decided that we would send "Thank-You" cards to every member of the congregation. It was to be just a little note to say, "Hey we appreciate you." This was toward the beginning when we were struggling to figure out how to draw closer to the congregation but didn't know how to do it. So we just mailed out those cards and our Heavenly Father blessed us because they opened the way for developing and renewing tender relationships with several in the Hall. I still remember Jason and how appreciative he was about his card. He never strikes me as a very emotional person, sometimes he seems rather hard, but he had tears in his eyes when he told us how he enjoyed receiving his card and how he said it was very "loving". In turn that made Rebekah and I feel very, very good.

I really miss good friends like Jason.

--

"And if you won’t apologize
If you can’t look me in the eye
I forgive you ..."
- Juliana Hatfield, Noblesse Oblige

Happy

“Happy are YOU when people reproach YOU and persecute YOU and lyingly say every sort of wicked thing against YOU for my sake. Rejoice and leap for joy, since YOUR reward is great in the heavens; for in that way they persecuted the prophets prior to YOU. - Matthew 5:11,12

Tonight was one of those nights were you realise just how much your Heavenly Father really, really cares for you. Rebekah and I are glowing and happy and just want to praise our God.

Believe me when I say that it took every bit of my strength to go the meeting tonight and then when I had no more strength left I had to pray for enough to get out the door. Because I'm timid by nature and who really wants to go have abuse raked on them? And it is because I am timid that I needed to do this to go and suffer just as Christ suffered - to be slandered and ridiculed - and stand up and take it.

I knew that tonight they were going disown me with a simple sentence, "Anthony Mathenia is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses". That would've been bad enough but little did I know exactly how far it would go. The gloves came off and in an expanded local needs part (30 minutes long) they called me a liar. They said that my acts of affection to the members of the congregation were the insincere kisses of betrayal of Judas. They said I was a stranger leading sheep away to kill them. Their encore was calling me "Satan" and a "child of Satan". Suffice to say I've never been so abusively spoken of in my entire life.

So now I know why it was so important for me to go tonight. Because my Heavenly Father wanted to teach me some lessons about how He will take care of me even in the worst of situations. When I arrived at the meeting and I went and sat down I was feeling pretty awkward and down. I said a little prayer and then my Father answered me and confirmed His love for me. He then showered me with Holy spirit - it was so strong that it was instant joy and peace. I couldn't help but to smile and bask in His love. Rebekah got the Spirit too.

And so when the time came we just sat there aglow with the Spirit and let them say all their evil, twisted things against me. It didn't matter - they could rail and rail away cause we had such a beautiful inner calmness and strength. Their verbal attack meant nothing as the Large Shield of Faith kept deflecting their blows.

It is such pure, unadulterated joy tonight ... we came home and offered up praise to the Father for His goodness and underserved kindness. I'm so blessed to suffer as did Christ and yet at the same time I feel so unworthy to follow in his footsteps. I'm nowhere close to being in the same league.

What next? I really don't know ... but I'm looking forward to the future. I'm blessed to follow my Shepherd. Wherever Christ wants to lead me I'm willing - maybe this whole episode of my life was just a warm-up for the Big Leagues.

I do know that there isn't nowhere that I need to go because tonight I have arrived. Where am I? I'm outside the camp with Jesus.

"Hence Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people with his own blood, suffered outside the gate. Let us, then, go forth to him outside the camp, bearing the reproach he bore," - Hebrews 13:12,13

Resolution - An Open Letter

Dear Wood River Congregation,

It is with great sadness that I write you this letter. You may have noticed over the course of the last two months that I have been missing from some of the meetings and that I have not been able to share in commenting. Many of you have lovingly inquired if anything was the matter. Unfortunately we weren't able to be completely open with you as to what was going on. Now that the matter has been resolved I would like to take this opportunity to address your concerns.

The other day as I was going over the memorial Bible reading I thought quite a bit about Jesus’ last night with his friends. He had spent 3 ½ years with them attempting to teach them many important things. On that last night when time was ticking away what was interesting was what he chose to focus on, namely love, selflessness, enduring under tribulation, and prayer. It is with a similar outlook that I’m writing this letter as I’m to be killed in a spiritual sense is just a few days and would be remiss if I didn’t give you some parting words of love and encouragement.

Regrettably, I have been disfellowshipped from the Organization on the grounds of apostasy, and it will soon be formally announced to the congregation that I am "no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses". I completely reject this false charge and I appealed the decision of the Body of Elders. Unfortunately, my appeal was to no avail and therefore I am left with no other option at this time but to wait for Jehovah to straighten this out in His own due time.

I still feel in my heart that I am one Jehovah's Witnesses and I'm quite confident that our Heavenly Father still accepts me as such although from the standpoint of the Organization I am not. I have been reading the Psalms lately and they have been really encouraging in this regard. One in particular that warms my heart is Psalm 27:10 that reads, "In case my own father and my own mother did leave me, even Jehovah would take me up."

I know that what I am going through, though hard, is agreeable to my Heavenly Father, as the scriptures say, "For if someone, because of conscience toward God, bears up under grievous things and suffers unjustly, this is an agreeable thing. For what merit is there in it if, when you are sinning and being slapped you endure it? But if, when you are doing good and you suffer, you endure it, this is agreeable with God." - 1 Peter 2:19, 20

I wanted to write you this letter to let you, the Congregation of Wood River, know that I have thoroughly enjoyed this last year growing in love and faith with you. I spent the greater portion of my life in this congregation and yet painfully before last year I never took the time to really be a part of it. I cherish each conversation and the mutual affection that we have shared – this "interchange of encourage" has done much to build my faith and I hope it has built yours. (Romans 1:11,12) Despite all my difficulties lately I would not exchange one day of this past year for relief from my situation.

In particular, with quite a few of you, I've grown extremely close and my only worry throughout all this mess is how I may hurt you by being disfellowshipped, and slanderously labeled as an apostate. Please do not see this as a betrayal to you. My love for you was always sincere and I have meant every word that I spoke in your presence, from the stage, in comment, in prayer, and in our conversations. I know for the foreseeable future we will be apart – and that is painful – but I look forward to the day when we can reunited again; if not in this world, in the world to come – the new heavens and earth that we are awaiting according to a promise. (2 Peter 3:13)

I wanted nothing more than to continue in your midst longer - to continue to grow in widening out my tender affection for all of you. (2 Cor 6:13) I had hoped that I could be a support to you right down to the very end. Now that this is not possible, I only hope that in memory I could continue to help you in perhaps some small way.

I know that you have noticed a change in me, from what I was, to what I became to you. Quite a few of you have expressed positive thoughts toward this change. I could only direct all praise to Jehovah. Last year our Father was gracious enough to give me an anointing, though I didn't deserve it all. It is an undeserved kindness on His part to allow me a small measure of His Holy spirit that was able to transform me and turn my life around. My brothers and sisters I can attest to the power and the reality of the Holy spirit. If you are having difficulties in any area please pray for the spirit and believe that it can help you. Our Father will give it to you just as it written, "Therefore if you, although being wicked know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more so will the Father in heaven give Holy spirit to those asking him!" – Luke 11:13

Additionally I would encourage you to make it a habit to read your Bible daily. God's Word is such an absolute treasure and if you read it to come to know Him it will open your eyes and your heart. As the Psalm says, “Your word is a lamp to my foot, and a light to my roadway.” (Psalm 119:105) And speaking of the Psalms, we are just getting ready to go through them in our weekly Bible reading and it will be such an excellent time to really dig deep. The Psalms are full of such beauty, affection and understanding. What a treat it will be to listen to the friends offer up praise to Jehovah during the answer portion of the Bible Highlights in the weeks to come!

Please use every opportunity possible to speak of Jehovah's goodness to one another. The one thing I regret is how in our gatherings outside the meetings how little is said regarding our God. Additionally, it is painful that once the meeting ends, we are quick to begin talking about the mundane things of life. I've been guilty of this too but I think that if we would try to make an effort to speak of good things, then that small seed might blossom into something truly beautiful in the Wood River Hall. I know you appreciate what Jehovah and Christ Jesus have done for us – please don't hesitate to talk about it and “to offer to God a sacrifice of praise, that is, the fruit of lips which make public declaration to his name.” (Hebrews 13:15) The world beats us down so much that we could all use a little lift.

Friends please take time to show interest in the older ones at our hall. They are so lonely. Some even think that they might be abandoned during the Great Tribulation just as they feel abandoned by the congregation now. I know you love them and don't feel this way. Please let them know how much you love them and value them. Include them in your activities and meals. I want to see hugs and kisses and cheerful faces. Remember that James characterizes true worship by our willingness to "look after orphans and widows in their tribulation" – James 1:27

Support the body of elders in what is good as they are shouldering a heaven burden. (1 Timothy 5:17) No doubt you have been pained to lose so many good men recently such as Brother Solle, Brother Donahue, and Brother Honnen. This loss continues to be felt in our hall. It would be a shame to suffer even more - so be supportive wherever possible.

And since the elders are so loaded down please look for ways to minimize their weight by helping one another. Continue to grow in love for the congregation. In the spirit of 1 Peter 3:8,9 "Finally, all of you be like-minded, showing fellow feeling, having brotherly affection, tenderly compassionate, humble in mind, not paying back injury for injury or reviling for reviling, but, to the contrary, bestowing a blessing, because you were called to this course, so that you might inherit a blessing."

Around you are your brothers and sisters who would die for you, just as you would die for them. Our Lord Jesus tells us, "By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love among yourselves." (John 13:35) Really how can we be true Christians if while we won't go to war and kill our brothers, we then kill them daily by our hateful speech and gossip? As Jesus said on the Sermon on the Mount continuing wrathful with a brother and speaking abusively of them is as good as murdering them. (Matthew 5:21,22)

We can't let petty differences drive us apart and cause us to fade away. Of what benefit is it if we spend 6,000 hours in the field service to bring one person to a knowledge of the truth when in the meantime twenty brothers and sisters have slipped out the backdoor due to discouragement or lack of attention? Our ministry would be in vain! Please remember that we are to "work what is good toward all, but especially those related to us in the faith." - Galatians 6:10

It should not be a secret to you how close we are to the end. The great tribulation comes closer by the day. The only thing that is going to get us through that challenging time is our reliance on Jehovah God. Severe trials await us in the future and only those knowing their God will be able to act effectively. (Daniel 11:32) Now is the time to grow in faith and love for our Father, Jehovah God. Sure we know about Him but do we really know Him?

When we experience day-to-day trials we need to use these opportunities to perfect our faith and build our endurance. As James says, "Consider it all joy, my brothers, when you meet with various trials, knowing as you do that this tested quality of your faith works out endurance. But let endurance have its work complete, that you may be complete and sound in all respects, not lacking in anything." (James 1:2-4) Endurance is such a vital quality as far as salvation goes because as Jesus says, "he that has endured to the end is the one that will be saved." – Matthew 24:13

We are so close we just need to hang on. No matter what happens in the future do not allow it to pull you away from your God. Hang your complete faith and trust in Jehovah and Jesus alone. (John 14:1) "Do not put your trust in nobles, nor in the son of earthling man, to whom no salvation belongs." (Psalm 146:3)

My love for you continues to burn strong. I will not cease offering up prayers on your behalf. I am here for you if ever you need me, but I completely understand if you will feel compelled to shun for the time being. I will not hold this against you. I'm confident that all wrongs hidden will be uncovered and these betrayals of justice will be straightened out soon. As Jesus says, "And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly." - Luke 18:7,8a; NIV

So therefore let us continue to look forward with hope, not looking back with sorrow. Can you imagine what joys await us in the future? Imagine the entire universe united in perfect love and speaking only words of truth. Heaven and earth joined in praising our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son, Our King, Christ Jesus. (Psalm 96) No more pain. No more tears. No suffering. No abuse. "The former things have past away." (Revelation 21:3,4) Can you picture that perfect day?

True there is a lot of pain and hardship now; but did we expect anything less, so close to the end, in a world controlled by the wicked one? Hold on friends – we are going to make it through! I love how Paul puts it, "Consequently I reckon that the sufferings of the present season do not amount to anything in comparison with the glory that is going to be revealed in us" (Romans 8:18)

I will now end this in these important words of the Apostle John -- "Little children guard yourselves from idols." - 1 John 5:21

Yours through the love of the Christ to the end and beyond,


Anthony Mathenia

Our King And Savior

Hiatus

Consider it all joy, my brothers, when YOU meet with various trials, knowing as YOU do that this tested quality of YOUR faith works out endurance. But let endurance have its work complete, that YOU may be complete and sound in all respects, not lacking in anything. - James 1:2-4

Well my difficulties persist and this blog will still hang out in limbo until some issues get resolved. But I'm feeling quite good tonight so I just wanted to pop in here and update a wee-bit.

Our Heavenly Father is absolutely wonderful! You never know how much He'll carry you along and sustain you until you absolutely get down and out and have nowhere to go and no way to move. I have trials and I feel nothing but joy right now. Hopefully it is building endurance because as Jesus tells us at Luke 21:19 "By endurance on your part you will save your souls."

I'm keeping busy in study. I fell into the book of Exodus a couple of days back and haven't left. It is absolutely amazing the level of detail that lurks just under the surface of these Bible accounts. The incident with the golden calf is very, very provocative. So many questions to ponder and hopefully get some answers.

I just wanted to post this and let you all know that I'm doing good and have never been happier despite it all! The loss that I'm experiencing right now is absolutely staggering but I feel like Paul who wrote, "On account of [Jesus] I have taken the loss of all things and I consider them as a lot of refuse, that I may gain Christ" (Phillipians 3:8) And as Jesus tells us at Mark 8:34-36, "If anyone wants to come after me, let him disown himself and pick up his torture stake and follow me continually. For whoever wants to save his sould will lose it; but whoever loses his soul for the sake of me and the good news will save it. Really, of what benefit is it for a man to gain the whole world and to forfeit his soul?"

My love to all the holy ones scattered about outside the camp.

Hang on we are going to win in the end.

Yours in Christ Jesus our Lord,

Anthony

Psalm 5:7

"As for me, in the abundance of your loving-kindness
I shall come into your house,
I shall bow down toward your holy temple in fear of you"
-Psalm 5:7

When Solomon inaugurated the newly built temple in Jerusalem he indicated that when a person prayed to Jehovah they would pray toward the temple. Since Jehovah's name rested on the temple by positioning facing His house they were in affect praying before Him.

"And you must turn toward the prayer of your servant and to his request for favor, O Jehovah my God, to listen to the entreating cry and to the prayer with which your servant is praying before you today; that your eyes may prove to be opened toward this house night and day, toward the place of which you said, ‘My name will prove to be there,’ to listen to the prayer with which your servant prays toward this place. you must listen to the request for favor on the part of your servant and of your people Israel with which they pray toward this place; and may you yourself hear at the place of your dwelling, in the heavens, and you must hear and forgive." - 1 Kings 8:28-30

Even after the destruction of Jerusalem in 587 by the Babylonians captives like the prophet Daniel were in the habit of praying toward where the temple once stood.

"But Daniel, as soon as he knew that the writing had been signed, entered into his house, and, the windows in his room chamber being open for him toward Jerusalem, even three times in a day he was kneeling on his knees and praying and offering praise before his God as he had been regularly doing prior to this." - Daniel 6:10

It was in Babylon that the synagogue arrangement of worship and instruction was developed in absence of having a temple available. Synagogues were situated in such a way that those there faced toward Jerusalem - a tradition that has exists today.

"The Ark in a synagogue is positioned in such a way that those who face it, face towards Jerusalem. Thus, sanctuary seating plans in the Western world generally face east, while those east of Israel face west. Sanctuaries in Israel face towards Jerusalem. Occasionally synagogues face other directions for structural reasons, in which case the community may turn to face Jerusalem when standing for prayers." - Wikipedia; Synagogue

Discontinued

I'm pulling my blog offline for the time being. I'm going through some challenging times right now but Jehovah is helping me along. If you've got room for it please include me in your prayers.

"Jehovah is my strength and my shield
In Him my heart has trusted,
And I have been helped, so that my heart exults,
And with my song I shall laud him." - Psalm 28:7

Say Goodbye

No telling how this came to be
You ending up here when you didn't agree
But now that you're gone, when people fall wrong
You'll be the one who's missing the fun

No turning back to what you do
You'll float in the air and you'll savor the view
And when you get down, just look all around
It's all or none in what's to come

Picture so perfect you'll want to give
So lonesome a soul
Some reason to live
That's just how it goes, you and your wings exposed
You didn't ask for the part
It's all just breaking your heart
Your will is dying and they are crying out to you

Say goodbye to all your friends
Say goodbye to all your friends and all your lovers until the end

Who needs a myth when you're young and free
But you are the angel you're smiling at me
It's all just breaking your heart

Now that this time is feeling so new
You'll know what to do
Not to lose
The love you left behind

-Say Goodbye, Papas Fritas

difficult days ahead

But because of the false brothers brought in quietly, who sneaked in to spy upon our freedom which we have in union with Christ Jesus, that they might completely enslave us— to these we did not yield by way of submission, no, not for an hour, in order that the truth of the good news might continue with YOU. - Galatians 2:2-5

. . .

“Happy are YOU when people reproach YOU and persecute YOU and lyingly say every sort of wicked thing against YOU for my sake. Rejoice and leap for joy, since YOUR reward is great in the heavens; for in that way they persecuted the prophets prior to YOU - Matthew 5:11,12

. . .

“Obstinate men and uncircumcised in hearts and ears, YOU are always resisting the holy spirit; as YOUR forefathers did, so YOU do. Which one of the prophets did YOUR forefathers not persecute? Yes, they killed those who made announcement in advance concerning the coming of the righteous One, whose betrayers and murderers YOU have now become, YOU who received the Law as transmitted by angels but have not kept it.” - Acts 7:51-53


. . .

“But before all these things people will lay their hands upon YOU and persecute YOU, delivering YOU up to the synagogues and prisons, YOU being haled before kings and governors for the sake of my name. It will turn out to YOU for a witness. Therefore settle it in YOUR hearts not to rehearse beforehand how to make YOUR defense, for I will give YOU a mouth and wisdom, which all YOUR opposers together will not be able to resist or dispute" - Luke 21:12-15

. . .

Because if they do these things when the tree is moist, what will occur when it is withered?” - Luke 23:31

. . .

Hence Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people with his own blood, suffered outside the gate. Let us, then, go forth to him outside the camp, bearing the reproach he bore, for we do not have here a city that continues, but we are earnestly seeking the one to come. - Hebrews 13:12-14

. . .

Will The Real Heretics Please Stand Up

I just finished reading an excellent book by David W. Bercot entitled, "Will The Real Heretics Please Stand Up; A New Look at Today's Evangelical Church in the Light of Early Christianity".

Mr. Bercot, like me, has a big interest in the so-called "Church Fathers" of the 1st and 2nd centuries. His reasoning is that since these Christians had a living link to Jesus and the Apostles that their testimony for how early Christianity operated is highly valuable. What he set out to do is to show just how far removed the modern Christian Evangelical movement is from early Christianity. What we discover is that even those who claim they are "conservative" would be considered spiritually weak in the early church. I particularly enjoyed the section on baptism and what it meant for them to "carry the cross".

Later in the book it discusses how Christianity became corrupted. Really it wasn't so much early apostate sects like the Gnostics or external persecution. The congregation had stood firm against these things for many years. But the church was broken when it disregarded Jesus' advice to be "no part of the world". When it sided with the Roman government it was all over. It was through that means that Satan weakened the congregations and then introduced moral corruption, foreign concepts and unbiblical ideas.

The only criticism I have of this book is that it skirts around the issue of the trinity doctrine. From my reading and research it is apparent that the early Christians believed that though the Father and the Son had the same essence or quality that they were seperate beings. The Father was greater than the Son, as Jesus had expressed. "When Jesus Became God: The Struggle to Define Christianity during the Last Days of Rome" by Richard Rubenstein does good job of showing how the trinity concept became the official doctrine of the Catholic Church.

Rock or Sand?

“Therefore everyone that hears these sayings of mine and does them will be likened to a discreet man, who built his house upon the rock-mass. And the rain poured down and the floods came and the winds blew and lashed against that house, but it did not cave in, for it had been founded upon the rock-mass. Furthermore, everyone hearing these sayings of mine and not doing them will be likened to a foolish man, who built his house upon the sand. And the rain poured down and the floods came and the winds blew and struck against that house and it caved in, and its collapse was great.” Matthew 7:24-27

Last night I had the privilege to talk to a couple of sisters who are having great difficulties in their life. For them the rain has poured down, the flood is coming in, and the wind is howling at the door.

For one of these sisters the problem is a financial one and due to gross injustice in the world she is suffering. While it would be a mistake to say that she isn't anxious over her situation it would be wrong to say that she is fearful of the hurricane that is about to rip through her life. I admire her faith and when she tells me, "I'm not scared" I sincerely believe her.

Sadly she has been abandoned in her time of need by those who should be blood bound to take care of her. I think of David who was no stranger to adversity and I secretly wonder if there will ever come a time that finds us running around and living in caves like David - our house having turned on us. But should I really wonder when the Lord Jesus tells Christians to expect that very thing? "Indeed, a man’s enemies will be persons of his own household." (Matthew 10:36) As for David I doubt any of us could match the beauty of the lyrics to his song recorded at Psalm 27.

"Jehovah is my light and my salvation.
Of whom shall I be in fear?
Jehovah is the stronghold of my life.
Of whom shall I be in dread?
...
In case my own father and my own mother did leave me,
Even Jehovah himself would take me up.
...
Hope in Jehovah; be courageous and let your heart be strong.
Yes, hope in Jehovah."

Today, in particular those who hope in Jehovah and those who follow the sayings of His son are being targeted by the accuser and his children on the earth. (Rev 12:10) But no one said that this Christian life would be easy. To the contrary our master Jesus asks us point blank at Matthew 20:10, "Can you drink the cup that I am going to drink?" He tells us, "pick up [your] torture stake day after day and follow me." (Luke 9:22,23) Following Jesus does not come without hardship and sometimes it may even mean that we have no place to lay down our head. (Luke 9:58)

But the storm of such tribulation can be met as courageously as Jesus met it. And though our house may shake a little bit in the driving wind and battering rain, and though we may startle at the crack of thunder we are confident when the morning star shines our house will still be standing; that is if our house is built on faith - faith in the Son and faith in the Father who sent him.

We are in a long-distance race "pursuing down toward the goal for the upward call of God by means of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:1) And as is true with physical marathon anyone who wishes to run such a spiritual race must build up endurance - not just in the short stretch but in the long haul. The scriptures constantly motivate us toward endurance as is found in James 1:2,3, "Consider it all joy, my brothers, when YOU meet with various trials, knowing as YOU do that this tested quality of YOUR faith works out endurance."

The Bible book of Revelation prophetically calls for a special time for endurance in the future. It speaks of a period when a worldwide government, symbolized by a seven headed wild beast, will put under compulsion all persons of the earth to receive its "mark" by submitting to its rule and rejecting the Kingdom of God. Regarding this the prophecy reads, "And it [the wild beast] puts under compulsion all persons, the small and the great, and the rich and the poor, and the free and the slaves, that they should give these a mark in their right hand or upon their forehead, and that nobody might be able to buy or sell except a person having the mark, the name of the wild beast or the number of its name." - Revelation 13:16,17

This prophecy indicates tests and trials for all for those who will not worship this beast-like Government and will remain loyal to God's Kingdom. We can only imagine what financial hardships will come upon those who would are not able to participate in the day-to-day commerce of buying and selling. Revelation 14:9 therefore contains a call for endurance saying, "Here is where it means endurance for the holy ones, those who observe the commandments of God and the faith of Jesus.”

Each day we are given opportunities to build this kind of endurance and faith. But too often we may find that we have spent a lot of time, perhaps all of our lives, building a hollow, lifeless faith - a sand foundation that can in no way last what is to come upon us. We may have built a beautiful sand castle. It looks impressive and yet when the waves wash ashore it instantly dissolves. If water has that effect how then will it be when the day of fire comes upon us? (2 Peter 3:5-7)

Going back to our starting scripture Matthew 7:24-27 our foundation is built on hearing and then doing the sayings of Jesus Christ. Paul says this same thing to the Corinthian congregation, "For no man can lay any other foundation than what is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if anyone builds on the foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood materials, hay, stubble, each one’s work will become manifest, for the day will show it up, because it will be revealed by means of fire; and the fire itself will prove what sort of work each one’s is. If anyone’s work that he has built on it remains, he will receive a reward; if anyone’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss, but he himself will be saved; yet, if so, [it will be] as through fire. (1 Corinthians 3:11-14)

The second sister I talked to is going through a difficult time in discovering that her foundation might not be as solid as she had once thought. I hesitate to put words in her mouth so I will speak of my own example as it is somewhat similar and in doing so I will attempt to be sensitive to those who read this. I was raised as one of Jehovah's Witnesses and was taught many wonderful Bible truths from an early age. I was excited by the resurrection hope and the thought of living forever in a paradise on Earth. I recognized a God of love who sent his own son to die for us. I was also given a Bible based moral code to live by and while I had my failings all and all I lived a life morally elevated from those around me. Too I was also raised with a set of works that was ingrained in me from an early age - most Witnesses can easily recite this recipe for everlasting life, that is, meeting attendance, field service, personal study, Bible reading, and prayer. I did all of those things - sometimes a lot and sometimes less and occasionally not at all.

The one thing I lacked was endurance. It was not uncommon for me to pioneer for many months and then quickly become irregular in service or I would have a spurt of meeting attendance and then suddenly become absent. I had a history of numerous failed Bible reading programs. (As a result I think I have probably read Genesis more than any other book of the Bible) My prayers were spotty, hit and miss, and normally relegated to times when I felt that I needed something, mostly material. It just didn't seem like I could maintain any one area let alone manage them all.

And even when I was doing these things it was rather hollow and mechanical. The extent of my personal study was underlining a Watchtower magazine. My Bible reading was covering a prescribed amount of chapters each day and counting them down like a prison sentence. When I prayed to God I resorted to a standard set of clichés, saying the same things over and over again. My ministry activity was just passing out literature or quickly blasting through a thirty-second sermon without ever really getting to know my neighbor. And when I met together at Christian meetings I never used these opportunities for Christian fellowship. There too I missed opportunities to get to know my brothers and sisters and to demonstrate the love that was supposed to be the mark of true Christians (Hebrews 10:24,5; John 13:35)

Most of the time I just went through the motions and had fooled myself thinking that I as long as I was doing what was asked of me by an organization of men and fully relying on them that my future was secure. But the things that I was doing to build and demonstrate faith, while good and noble things, were just hay and stubble and sand. I did not have a foundation that would get me through even the smallest of life's problems, let alone the big things that shake us to our core.

One of those big things happened to me in 2004 and it resulted in my house not just giving way a bit but also completely collapsing. It feels weird to think of me then. As it is, I still remember anecdotally how it was for me and yet that person seems so foreign and strange. Was that really me who doubted the existence of God? Was that really me that flagrantly thumbed my nose at God's moral commands? My problem was when I lost my faith - I just didn't lose it a little - I lost every scrap of it. Sadly, a foundation that I had spent twenty-seven years building simply vanished overnight.

And yet here I am now by the grace (underserved kindness) of God assured of His love for me and determined to follow his commands and the words of His son, Jesus. My life has improved so much since then and in every way possible my spirituality has increased to levels I never knew. I don't blow my own horn for it was God who did the calling and the building up. As Paul put it, "You people are God's field under cultivation, God's building." (1 Corinthians 3:9) and again, "For YOU behold his calling of YOU, brothers, that not many wise in a fleshly way were called, not many powerful, not many of noble birth; but God chose the foolish things of the world, that he might put the wise men to shame; and God chose the weak things of the world, that he might put the strong things to shame; and God chose the ignoble things of the world and the things looked down upon, the things that are not, that he might bring to nothing the things that are, in order that no flesh might boast in the sight of God. But it is due to him that YOU are in union with Christ Jesus, who has become to us wisdom from God, also righteousness and sanctification and release by ransom; that it may be just as it is written: “He that boasts, let him boast in Jehovah.” (1 Corinthians 1:27)

Now in retrospect I can see why things went wrong for me. My faith was exclusively in imperfect men. I didn't listen to God who told me again and again and again at Psalms 146:3 "Do not put YOUR trust in nobles, Nor in the son of earthling man, to whom no salvation belongs." and yet it was in these noble men that I absolutely staked my salvation. It is so easy to become of follower of men because to some extent it relieves us of any obligation to answer for our own decisions. At 2 Corinthians 13:5 we are told to, Keep testing whether YOU are in the faith, keep proving what YOU yourselves are.. Unfortunately we can rely too much on others to prove to us "whether we are in the faith" and focus ourselves in "pleasing men". (Galatians 1:10) After all it is men who attempt to make us accountable to them, it is men that we can see, and sadly it is these men who can become an idol standing in the way and blocking our vision to "the spiritual realities not beheld" - these very men cutting us off from the "kingdom of the heavens" (Hebrews 11:1; Matthew 23:13) Here we are living the hour, "when the true worshipers will worship the Father with spirit and truth." and yet we still are tempted worship through the physical people, places, and things as if Jesus never came to earth and showed us the better way. (John 4:21) And although Jesus Christ set us free from law we still seek to gain salvation by an extensive set of rules, codes, and structured systems of works. This can become a "yoke of slavery" that can prevent us from "walking by spirit" in the very same way it proved to be a fatal stumbling block for many Christians in the 1st century. (Galatians 5:1,16-18) All of this constitutes "a form of godly devotion" and yet it is completely powerless and ineffectual. (2 Timothy 3:5)

It is not uncommon upon making these realizations to ask a hard question, "Where should I should I go now?" I asked that question and I'm sure that I wasn't the first nor will I be the last. Some who discover that their system of worship may be flawed are quick to hastily exchange it for another system of worship that is even more flawed then the one they left behind. To me this is contrary to the words of our Lord, Jesus Christ and our obligation to those related to us in the faith.

I ask this, If I were to say, "I'm in the Truth", what would that mean to you? Well you may relate "the truth" to our organization, our religion. But "the truth" as presented in the Bible is none other than Jesus. For Jesus says at John 14:6, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." We would be quite foolish to attempt to come to the Father through men or an organization when Jesus is the only way. And to say that we are "in the truth" should only mean one thing to us - that we are "in union with Christ" (Galatians 3:26-29)

Again we may ask the question, "Where should we go?" However in truth it is not really a question as to where to go as it is a question of to whom to go to. The apostle Peter answers thusly, "Lord, whom shall we go away to? You have sayings of everlasting life" (John 6:68) How wonderful it is to come to know our Heavenly Father through His representative, Jesus! (John 5:43) How can one not be impressed with the qualities that Jesus displayed, in particular his love and his selflessnes? It was in these things that Jesus set the example and the path for us, such as it is written in 1 Peter 2:21 "In fact, to this [course] YOU were called, because even Christ suffered for YOU, leaving YOU a model for YOU to follow his steps closely. He committed no sin, nor was deception found in his mouth."

We recognize that the brotherhood that we love so much does not belong to a legal body or any men taking the lead among us; but rather it belongs to Christ who is the head of the congregation. (Colossians 1:18; 1 Corinthians 1:12,13) Having affection for Jesus means taking care of those whom he loves and we show this by tenderly feeding and shepherding his little sheep. (John 21:15-17) Each and every occasion for gathering together as Christians provides us a beautiful opportunity to build each other’s faith, to encourage one another and "incite to love and fine works". (Hebrews 10:24,25) We strive to provide a good example of Godly conduct so that others can imitate our faith. (Hebrews 13:7) Doing so we build our own foundation by doing the words of Jesus and at the same time we help others to build a solid foundation of faith. Not that we as imperfect men become masters over the faith of others but our aim is to help others stand by means of their own faith. (2 Corinthians 1:24)

So for me I found that after going to the Father through Jesus I really had nowhere else that I needed to go. I was blessed to be in association with a group of people of who for the most part are generally interested in God and the Bible. I'm happy to attend the spiritual meetings and minister on their behalf and serve shoulder to shoulder with them as God's fellow workers in the ministry work. My hope is that in some small way I could serve them, to impart some spiritual gift, and to have a real "interchange of encouragement" through mutual expressions of faith. (Romans 1:11,12). There is an urgency in this because I realize there may come a time when I'm not able to. (John 16:2) In the meantime, I try my best to keep in mind Paul's words at Galatian 6:10, "Really, then, as long as we have time favorable for it, let us work what is good toward all, but especially toward those related to [us] in the faith."

Under the knife, the chisel, the file, the drill ...

Yesterday I had my dentist appointment to remove two very, very bad teeth. The oral surgery went well enough - the worst part being the numerous numbing shots in my gums and the roof of my mouth. My wisdom tooth came out rather quickly. It came in about five years ago and broke off at the gum line. The doctor then went to work on my abcessed tooth. I felt a little pain so we went with another round of shots that left me slackjawed. It took alot of work to get out the tooth out. I left with two prescriptions for pain medicine and my disgusting, corrupted teeth in a little envelope. It wasn't a bad experience and the dentist was nice enough - I would definately go there again but let's hope I don't have to!

New Bible

I've decided to read the Christian-Greek Scriptures through again. (As opposed to my normal routine of reading Revelation over and over and over again.) I read a nice suggestion in the past to read-through using different Bible translations so on Friday at the book store I took some time to check out a couple versions. In particular I looked at a parallel Bible that contained two very popular versions of the Bible, the New International Version (NIV) as well as the "The Message" paraphrase. Since we are currently studying Galatians I read through it in both versions.

The Message Bible was incredibly loose in how it rendered things and was greatly coloured by the translators bias. For instance when Paul enumerates the works of the flesh in Galatians chapter 5, "The Message Bible" subsituted, "repetitive, loveless, cheap sex;" for fornication. Instead of reflecting the Spirit of God the Message Bible reflects the spirit of the world, the improper idea that sex outside of marriage is ok so long as the couple loves each other. Sadly The Message Bible is extremely popular today, especially among young people.

I settled on the NIV translation which seems to be pretty good although I don't like how God's name is removed from the Hebrew Scriptures. Right now I really looking forward to going through the scriptures again. Last night in Matthew I was just absolutely floored by the beauty of Jesus' Sermon on the Mount. I was really encouraged by verses 10-12 of chapter 5.

"Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.
Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."

Rough Night

Romans 8:35 Who will separate us from the love of the Christ? Will tribulation or distress or persecution or hunger or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 Just as it is written: “For your sake we are being put to death all day long, we have been accounted as sheep for slaughtering.” 37 To the contrary, in all these things we are coming off completely victorious through him that loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers 39 nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God’s love that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Abcessed Tooth = No iMac

About six months ago I was eating a sandwich at Quizno's and chunk of my tooth broke out. (The bread was really, really hard.) Since then little ugly brown bits have continued to come out until I now have half of a tooth. A few months back I had this awful dull feeling that was nauseating - I gave it a couple days while I debated going to the dentist. The pain went away and cancelled my appointment. Well now the pain is back 100-fold. Last Friday greeted me an intense stabbing feeling on one of my molars.

I went to dentist tonight for the first time in 6 years and I got an x-ray that determined that my tooth was horribly abcessed and that I would need a root canal. I declined the root canal - heard to many awful things about them. So now I'm up for oral surgery in a week or so. In the meantime I've got antibiotics for the infection and vicodin for the blinding pain.

So I guess this means no new iMac for my sorry self.

Sorry for sounding so pathetic and loopy ...

... must be the vicodin kicking in. smiley face. winky emoticon.

A Pale Horse

A CNN news article Bird flu 'could take 142m lives' summarized a report entitled Global Macroeconomic Consequences of Pandemic Influenza by Sydney Australia's Lowry Institute. Therein it suggests a mild pandemic could kill 1.4 million people while a "worst case" pandemic would take 142 million lives, dwarfing the Spanish Flu of 1918.

Now the question is this a legimate assessment or fear-mongering? Time will tell.

"And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seven seals, and I heard one of the four living creatures say with a voice as of thunder: "Come!" ... And I saw, and, look! a pale horse; and the one seated upon it had the name Death. And Hades was closely following him. And authority was given them over the fourth part of the earth, to kill ... with deadly plague." - Revelation 6:1,8

"He that bears witness of these things says, 'Yes; I am coming quickly.'"
"Amen! Come, Lord Jesus." - Revelation 22:20

A Week In Photos

Sorry for the slow load times ..

Cliche Photo #1.


Mina is a tiger. (Even gasoline wouldn't take the face paint off.)


Can you dig it?


Waiting in line for the bus.


Mina's "dinner" at the California Grill. (California Grill is quite possibly the only 4-star restaurant where you can colour on the table cloth.)



Riding on the Caroussel.



Cliche Photo #2.


Eating ice cream.


Visiting the UK.


Our English cottage.




Poor man's LOMO.

Carousel of Progress

Carousel of Progress (Adobe Illustrator 2006)

World War III

I woke up thinking on the upcoming world war, particularly how it is commonly felt by Jehovah's Witnesses that a nuclear World War III is Biblically impossible. The reasoning used is that such a war would mean the entire destruction of humanity and the earth and this would contradict what the Bible says about the longevity of the inhabited earth. (Isaiah 45:18; Ecclesiastes 1:4; Psalm 37:29)

This morning I fired up the Watchtower library CD-ROM to find where such a line of reasoning had its origins. It was surprising to discover that the Watchtower publications seem to have acknowledged the possibility of a third World War, even a nuclear one. In the 6/8/81 Awake! article, "Hope of Escaping World Destruction" the following was said "Will this nationalistic "pushing" match result in World War III? Possibly." Additionally the article acknowledged the Bible didn't specify whether an arms race would touch off World War III.

Perhaps the confusion then comes from the Reasoning book that presumes that a nuclear world war would equal the eradication of humanity and the earth. Under the subheading "Earth: Will planet Earth be destroyed in a nuclear war?" The question is raised: "Is there a possibility that, since the nations show little regard for God's purpose, they might completely ruin the earth for habitation anyway?" In answer the book says, "The nuclear power developed by the nations is fear inspiring to men. But billions of stars employ nuclear power on a scale that is beyond our ability to comprehend. Who created and controls all these heavenly bodies? Can He not prevent the nations from using their nuclear weapons in a way that would hinder his purpose? That God would do this is illustrated by his destroying the military power of Egypt when Pharaoh sought to stop the deliverance of Israel."

Such reasoning though is rooted in the old Cold War mentality of MAD (Mutual Assured Destruction). MAD was a component of the arms race between the US and the old Soviet Union that maintained a tense state of peace through the idea that if one country used nuclear weapons the other would quickly respond with equal force ensuring the mutual destruction of both. It was basically a "Mexican Standoff" stalemate with both countries pointing a loaded gun at the other. Commenting on the devastating affects of any such war a Soviet Union booklet stated, "The Soviet Union holds that nuclear war would be a universal disaster, and that it would most probably mean the end of civilization. It may lead to the destruction of all mankind"

However now in the 21st-century nuclear weapons are moving from being simply a deterrent to an active part of the modern military arsenal. Many of the larger cold war nuclear missiles systems have been dismantled and phased out in favor of the development of smaller, tactical nuclear devices. A BBC News article "Mini-nukes on US agenda" said "A new form of warfare is coming. It is the extension into the nuclear field of the highly accurate conventional bombs and missiles already in use."

Plans are already on the boards to use such nuclear devices immediately against Iran. The August 1, 2005 issue of the American Conservative commented, "The Pentagon, acting under instructions from Vice President Dick Cheney's office, has tasked the United States Strategic Command (STRATCOM) with drawing up a contingency plan to be employed in response to another 9/11-type terrorist attack on the United States. The plan includes a large-scale air assault on Iran employing both conventional and tactical nuclear weapons."

So all that stands between humanity and a nuclear war is another domestic terrorist attack. The likelihood of another terrorist attack was recently expressed by counterterrorist expert Juval Aviv. When asked "Do you believe another terrorist attack is likely on American soil?", Mr. Aviv answered, "I predict, based primarily on information that is floating in Europe and the Middle East, that an event is imminent and around the corner here in the United States. It could happen as soon as tomorrow, or it could happen in the next few months. Ninety days at the most." (U.S. Terror Attack - 'Ninety Days at Most' - FoxNews.com) As it presently stands nuclear war is only a matter of time.

What does the future hold? Well God's Word predicted unparalleled time of great tribulation that will soon come upon the earth. This tribulation will be so bad that if it was not cut short humanity would not survive. "for then there will be great tribulation such as has not occurred since the world's beginning until now, no, nor will occur again. In fact, unless those days were cut short, no flesh would be saved; but on account of the chosen ones those days will be cut short." (Matthew 24:21,22)

Additionally Revelation 11:18 says that God's Kingdom, "will bring to ruin those ruining the earth" In that time in what way will humans be "ruining the earth"? Is it through pollution and environmental ruin as has been often stated? It appears to me that this scripture is specifically speaking of earth being ruined through violence. It is important to keep in mind that much of Revelation finds parallel in other parts of the inspired Bible. So we can compare Revelation 11:18 to Genesis chapter 6:11,12 which states the "And the earth came to be ruined in the sight of the true God and the earth became filled with violence. So God saw the earth and, look! it was ruined, because all flesh had ruined its way on the earth." Notice now the result in verse 13, "After that God said to Noah: "The end of all flesh has come before me, because the earth is full of violence as a result of them; and here I am bringing them to ruin together with the earth."

The days of Noah are directly comparable to the days leading up to Christ's coming.(Matthew 24:37,38) It would not be unreasonable to assume that the earth may be filled with violence just as in the days of Noah. Indeed a comparison or Revelation 11:18 to Genesis 6 give evidence that this will be the case. Jesus' words in Matthew 24:6 give indication that a period of wars will come before the time of the end. He says, "You are going to hear of wars and reports of wars; see that you are not terrified. For these things must take place, but the end is not yet."

Looking at the news it appears as if things are definitely heading toward a period that has been termed, "The Clash of Civilizations". The conflict between Islam and the West is strengthening and increased war and violence loom on the horizon. World War III appears to be right around the corner - or perhaps in retrospect it may have already started.

What can we do? I like how Jesus expresses it at Luke 21:34-36:

"But pay attention to yourselves that YOUR hearts never become weighed down with overeating and heavy drinking and anxieties of life, and suddenly that day be instantly upon YOU as a snare. For it will come in upon all those dwelling upon the face of all the earth. Keep awake, then, all the time making supplication that YOU may succeed in escaping all these things that are destined to occur, and in standing before the Son of man."

Seriously give consideration to this. For instance how often have you prayed that you and your family will be delivered from the coming tribulations? How often have you heard someone in the congregation pray that we make escape these things? If your answer is, "not very often" or "never" then we really need to note that this scripture says that we should be making supplication "all the time".

There and Back Again

We had our return flight today in the afternoon and it is good to be home. I missed associating with my friends quite a bit so it was excellent to jump right back in with a nice discussion on Galatians today. Galatians 2:6-9 gave me something to think about, how as sons of Abraham we are needing to imitate the faith of Abraham. I don't feel that I given enough attention to the example of Abraham.

Our trip was nice. The weather was usually chilly in the morning but pleasant in the afternoon. At first seven days seemed a bit drawn out but as the week progressed our touring pace dropped to more a relaxing jaunt. Highlights for me included an excellent dinner at California Grill, drinking and eating 'round the world at Epcot, and riding Expedition Everest at the Animal Kingdom over and over and over and over again.

California Grill is billed as market cuisine and I'm still unsure about what that means. They had a brand new menu when we went on Wednesday. We started the meal with cocktails while we ate the Quadruple Cheese Flat Bread with Sun-dried Tomatoes and Basil Pesto. For the first course Rebekah had Roasted Pumpkin Soup with pumpkin seed pesto and spiced creme fraiche. I don't really like pumpkin but I thought that it was pretty nice and little sweet. I ordered the usual sushi sampler as my first course. As always California Grill had great sushi. For the main course Rebekah got the Oak-fired Beef Filet with Potato and Gorgonzola Pave, Blue Lake beans, and Tamarind Barbecue Sauce. I ordered the Black Grouper with olive oil wrapped potatoes, piperade, merguez sausage and crispy rock shrimp. My grouper was crispy and excellent - all good except for the sausage, it was way too spicy and overpowering for how delicate the fish was. For desert we split Heirloom Apple Tart - Braeburn Apple and Brown Butter Tart - with autumn spiced-apple cider ice cream and caramel sauce. We were able to watch fireworks while dined which is always an added bonus.

Photo pictorial is forthcoming ...