Happy

“Happy are YOU when people reproach YOU and persecute YOU and lyingly say every sort of wicked thing against YOU for my sake. Rejoice and leap for joy, since YOUR reward is great in the heavens; for in that way they persecuted the prophets prior to YOU. - Matthew 5:11,12

Tonight was one of those nights were you realise just how much your Heavenly Father really, really cares for you. Rebekah and I are glowing and happy and just want to praise our God.

Believe me when I say that it took every bit of my strength to go the meeting tonight and then when I had no more strength left I had to pray for enough to get out the door. Because I'm timid by nature and who really wants to go have abuse raked on them? And it is because I am timid that I needed to do this to go and suffer just as Christ suffered - to be slandered and ridiculed - and stand up and take it.

I knew that tonight they were going disown me with a simple sentence, "Anthony Mathenia is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses". That would've been bad enough but little did I know exactly how far it would go. The gloves came off and in an expanded local needs part (30 minutes long) they called me a liar. They said that my acts of affection to the members of the congregation were the insincere kisses of betrayal of Judas. They said I was a stranger leading sheep away to kill them. Their encore was calling me "Satan" and a "child of Satan". Suffice to say I've never been so abusively spoken of in my entire life.

So now I know why it was so important for me to go tonight. Because my Heavenly Father wanted to teach me some lessons about how He will take care of me even in the worst of situations. When I arrived at the meeting and I went and sat down I was feeling pretty awkward and down. I said a little prayer and then my Father answered me and confirmed His love for me. He then showered me with Holy spirit - it was so strong that it was instant joy and peace. I couldn't help but to smile and bask in His love. Rebekah got the Spirit too.

And so when the time came we just sat there aglow with the Spirit and let them say all their evil, twisted things against me. It didn't matter - they could rail and rail away cause we had such a beautiful inner calmness and strength. Their verbal attack meant nothing as the Large Shield of Faith kept deflecting their blows.

It is such pure, unadulterated joy tonight ... we came home and offered up praise to the Father for His goodness and underserved kindness. I'm so blessed to suffer as did Christ and yet at the same time I feel so unworthy to follow in his footsteps. I'm nowhere close to being in the same league.

What next? I really don't know ... but I'm looking forward to the future. I'm blessed to follow my Shepherd. Wherever Christ wants to lead me I'm willing - maybe this whole episode of my life was just a warm-up for the Big Leagues.

I do know that there isn't nowhere that I need to go because tonight I have arrived. Where am I? I'm outside the camp with Jesus.

"Hence Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people with his own blood, suffered outside the gate. Let us, then, go forth to him outside the camp, bearing the reproach he bore," - Hebrews 13:12,13