Spirit and Truth

So now that I've got more people reading this than ever before I feel a certain obligation to try to write deep meaningful posts. Like it would be a let down to write about my high Tetris score or my love of tacos or the new Daytrip record I just downloaded. Even so, most days I can't get my thoughts together coherently so I haven't been updated. But I do feel a certain need to write down what's been happening, more as a record than anything else.

All and all things have been going great for my family. There have been certain unavoidable complications since my disfellowshiping, mostly from extended family, and it hurts to be shunned by friends but I think on up side our spirituality has increased quite a bit. Mina and I have been pretty steady about doing a Bible study every night. As a family we are making it out habit to say a family prayer before bed so that has been really nice and helping us draw close as a family and toward our God.

I'm studying quite a bit, as usual I'm so ADHD when I study. It seems like I'm learning so much and yet each new thing I learn opens up a whole new arena of questions. Usually I am in Revelation and that book is being opened up quite bit to me. And seems like so many of us are arriving at the same conclusions and yet there are some chapters that we really have a variety of opinions on, such as Chapter 12. I've also fallen into a study on the Divine Name, not pronunciation or syntax, but in use and importance historically, in Jesus' ministry, the Greek scriptures (New Testament) and in these days. At night I'm reading Isaiah from the Dead Sea Scrolls.

I've been praying really hard about my personal ministry. My Heavenly Father has told me to be patient but I'm eager to get going on something. Yesterday though I really had to look back and realise that I was having a ministry but since it wasn't as obvious going door to door distributing magazines I didn't recognize it at first. Lots of interesting doors open up when you are not officially a JW. I've noticed that people are more inclined to talk to you about the Bible. For some reasons JW's are perceived as being arrogant so that tends to create walls. (In all honesty though I can admit that when I went door to door I tended to have superior attitude toward those I talked to.) So with the barriers down there have been some good experiences.

I've been helping out this one guy at work with some personal challenges he's been going through. He says that God sent me to help him. When someone says that it really makes it a challenge to say the right thing - because you really don't want to mess up. All I could think to do was give him some scriptures to read because I honestly didn't no what kind of advice to give him. Anyhow he called me last night and told me how much those scriptures really helped him. As he said, "You can't argue with the word. It's all there in black and red." (He's got a red-letter edition of the Bible, btw.) I think he will be joining me in a Bible study this Saturday which will be neat.

So I'm really having nice little successes despite myself. It's really nothing that I'm doing. But as much as my Father cares to use me I'm willing to be used. Sometimes I think about how easy it would be to just go out and receive instructions from a burning bush and know exactly what to do. But really even looking back at Exodus I wonder if it was just that explicit to Moses. It seems like there was a whole lot of wandering around in the wilderness before he was told what to do and then even thereafter it came it bit by bit.

Well I'm here in the wilderness, wandering around. I think about Moses when he fled Egypt. I think about David hiding out from Saul. I think about Elijah running away from Jezebel into the wilderness. Oh man do I think about Elijah. Like when he felt he was the only one and how God said that there were 7,000 others that hadn't bent their knee to Baal. (1 Kings 19:18) Talk about encouragement!

That has been the most encouraging thing lately is realising that I'm not the only the one. I'm not the only one sighing and groaning over the detestable things in my former denomination. (Ezekiel 9:3) In fact this isn't even limited strictly to the Watchtower society. Right now there is a definate exodus out of apostate Christianity. People are being called outside the camp to the true Congregation/Church - the Ecclesia that literally means "called out ones". This is so beyond anything that could ever be confined to a church building or a religious corporation/organization. As the Samaritan woman asked Jesus at the well, "Where should I worship? On this mountain or Jerusalem?" Where did Jesus direct her to worship? It wasn't a "where" it was was a "how" - He said, "the hour is coming, and it is now, when the true worshipers will worship the Father with spirit and truth". - John 4:1-54