Ephedra

CNN is reporting that the government will be taking steps to ban Ephedra. With obesity reaching epidemic portions in the US one would think that the government would start giving away the drug to its citizens.

Brandon came over last night. He was bummed out because his brother just got disfellowshipped. That wave of problems among the youth in my congregation was pretty widespread. Most of the congregations in our circuit were touched by it. Some lost quite a few teens. The odd thing was that all the problems were unrelated. I guess when one kid tells on themselves it sets off a weird chain-reaction where they all start telling on themselves and their friends. I felt bad for Brandon but I don't know how to be compassionate. I really didn't know what to say so I let Rebekah do the talking. She's my sensitive side.

The good news is that the MicroKorg worked great! I bought a midi cable and linked it to the drum machine. I hit a button and watched as new song miraculously appeared out of the circuits. Wild! The new combo-organ still needs to be tweaked. It's in great cosmetic shape but it has its problems. I'm going to drop by Radioshack and buy a soldering iron and some capacitors and see what I do. I'm nervous about it....

Organ

I was just thinking about how once we went a funeral and the parlor organ player was given a Kingdom Song Book. It was weird to hear these epic hammond renditions of the songs. They were familiar yet eerily foreign. It's too bad we don't do organs at the Kingdom Hall--perhaps it is too much like other churches.

I've got organs on my mind. I just bought an Elka Panther 300 from some guy in St. Louis and am heading out to pick it up.

all in

Rebekah and I made it to the winner's table at the poker tournament; however, our stay there was relatively short. In truth she lasted longer than me. I went "all-in" on a pocket-aces with a potential flush and lost to Nathan on the draw to a three-of-a-kind. It was a fun night and the food was plentiful and delicious.

Christmas day we lounged about the house recovering from the previous all-nighter. Eventually we woke, fired up iCal and began plotting our Walt Disney World vacation hour by hour. Because to get the most out of your Disney trip you have to attack in army style. At 1400 hours we'll meet at Space Mountain. At 1445 we should be crossing over into Fronteirland.

I made Rebekah talk to her Mom about one small issue for the trip. There shall be absolutely, positively NO fanny-packs of any kind. I heard that she took the news well enough but I still consider stealing hers just in case.

In other news my search for a Yamaha YC-45D organ is puttering along. I got a couple responses but unfortunately they were in far-off places where shipping would kill me; Fresno, CA and somewhere in Canada above Seattle. I'm hoping now that Christmas is out of the way I'll get some more leads. Until then I'm stuck using the "cheesy organ" setting on the Alpha Juno.

Keyboard Failure

We killed our second Mac keyboard last night. Unfortunately there is not a "no food or drink by the keyboard" rule that I can make that Mina can't break. Our caps lock key has been on the blink (literally) for a few months but Rebekah drove the nail into the coffin.

She has been harping on me for my soda drinking for the last couple of weeks. Yesterday I'm sitting at the computer enjoying a Pepsi when she grabs my head and begins pouring the Pepsi down my throat. "Ha ha! You like soda? Well drink up! drink up!" Eventually I reach the point where I'm having trouble swallowing it all and my mouth can't hold anymore and erupts in a shower of sticky sugar water and saliva. My keyboard got drenched.

We tried to save it, even going so far as to pop off all the keys and clean everything, but to no avail. When I tried to plug the keyboard back into the USB port it sparked and shut off the computer. I was relieved when I was able to turn the computer back on but the keyboard was dead. Rebekah had to go out and buy an emergency butt ugly Logitech keyboard at Wal-Mart so I could answer my e-mail.

Aragorn

I woke up quoting Aragorn. "I see in your eyes, the same fear that would take the heart of me ! A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day, this day we FIGHT !"

Last night Brandon came over with a new song that we worked on. It's another break-up song but he writes them so well I can't complain. I got so wrapped up in that I missed my sniper bid on a Yamaha YC-25D organ by one minute. That kind of bummed me out. So my search for a cheesy organ continues. I e-mailed every studio that listed a Yamaha YC-45D in their possession to see if I can find someone to sell it to me.

Even though I don't celebrate I'm looking forward to the Holiday. Nothing feels as good as a day off.

Jeans

For full effect of this blog entry download Ladytron's song "Blue Jeans" and play in the background as you read this.

Today Rebekah and I went shopping again. I've been needing a pair of jeans and Mina some dresses. Express was having a $20 off sale on jeans so I grabbed every affordable style they had there in attempt to find something suitable and headed to the changing rooms.

Much to my dissapointment it just wasn't working. The jeans were either too wide in the legs or loose in the seat or just plain ugly. We left and were walking through the crowded mall and I was lamenting how I can never find decent looking jeans when this guy passes with a great looking pair that caught both of our eyes. Rebekah said, "I wonder where he got them." I suggested they were probably from some boutique shop for $300.00 a pair. Rebekah said she would go ask him.

I stayed behind but their conversation went something like this.

Rebekah: "Excuse me."
Dood: "Yes."
Rebekah: "Can I ask you where you got those jeans?"
Dood: "Gap."
Rebekah: "Really, which style are they?"
Dood: "Well actually they're from Gap Women."

Now, this is kind of funny because mere minutes earlier Rebekah had just been telling me that I should get girl jeans and I laughed at her. But then this guy validates her thought completely. So I'm desperate and game so we head to the lady's Gap and then lady's Express.

Flash-forward to a couple awkward changing room experiences and I learn something new about myself. I'm a Gap Size 6-Ankle and a Express Size 8-Short. And oh yes, I did find a great pair of jeans.

Appliances

Rebekah and I stopped at a couple of places to browse kitchen appliances. Our mismatched refrigerator (with broken handle barely hanging on) and stove (with only two out of five knobs present) may be departing for... well wherever old used appliances end up.

The problem with appliances in the United States is that there is just not that much variety. You have two basic colors: white and black. (Steel can be chucked in for a couple hundred dollars more.) I contrast this with the UK where a refrigerator buyer can choose from any number of colors to match any conceivable color scheme.

The style also suffers. Smeg in the UK has really sweet looking units, both contemporary models and 50's throwbacks. However, the nearest North American supplier is Ontario Canada. Needless to say the shipping costs would be astronomical.

Rebekah prods me to just get a "normal" refrigerator and stove. The problem is that if I don't want to drop that kind of money on something I'm not really in love with. I want to smile everytime I walk through the kitchen door. I want to cherish each time I fire up a burner.

Perhaps, the old stove and Frigidaire aren't quite ready to be put to pasture?

live

Sunday I went with Brandon over to Cicero's to see a couple of bands. My interest was to check out the venue and inquire about the possability of us playing there. The place is mainly for Phish type jam bands or the token punk-rock. That's the biggest problem with St. Louis is that the local clubs only book these punk-rock bands. We don't really have a progressive music scene where an electroclash band would be welcomed. I keep telling Brandon we need to get a laundromat tour going. We'll just go to the area laundromats and rock out.

Brandon's coming over tonight and we are going to work on our live set. We really need to take a recording break as our creativity is strained.

Self-Mutilation

I'm staring at my ring shaped blister that is decorating my right thumb. Last night in a fit a of extreme genius I touched my thumb to the cherry-red car cigarette lighter. Why? It seemed like a good idea at the time. (Just like it once seemed reasonable to try to excise a mole on my chest with a Chinese kitchen cleaver.)

The smell of burning flesh was nauseating and the pain was intense. Score one for idiocy!

I'm also wondering why Blogger can tell you when you screwed up your HTML but can't do a simple spell-check? I've become overly dependent on Microsoft Words F7 and have regressed to the spelling prowess of a circus chimp.

This kid in my hall came up to me and gave me his review of "The Last Samurai". He prefaced it by saying, "I wouldn't tell anybody I saw this movie but..." At first I was flattered that I was privy to such clandestine information. But then I started wondering about whether or not his telling me about a rated-R movie he saw was indicative of anything. Why me? Do I give the image that I'm someone who is OK with that sort of thing?

It's snowing

last night

At the meeting last night three of our youths got publicly reproved. It was a painfully long announcement as one by one the names were read along with their accompanying restrictions.

And you sit there kind of shocked and metally running through all these mental guesses as to how they sinned. Ultimately you conclude sex because it is always the most likely. You are hurt because you care for them. Then you wise up and are relieved that they showed repentance and stuck it out as you consider all the youths you have seen leave over the years. Then you reflect on your own lesser moments and for a minute or two you feel the pain all over again.

Fear-Mongering

From the US media that brought you the great health scares West Nile and SARS comes an all new terror just in time for the holiday season -- THE FLU!!!! You can run, you can hide but you can't get a flu shot because supplies are running low.

**yawn**

2% or Whole?

I spent last night adding two electric outlets to the band room in preperation for the addition of more amplifiers. It seemed simple enough on the onset but I had to deal with the legacy left behind by the last homeowner who I refer sarcastically to as "Super Electrician".

The house is wired like a maze. If you turn off one circuit it'll shut off the bedroom clock, the kitchen refrigerator, the north wall of the living room, and the bathroom light. It really needs to be ripped at started from scratch but I know it'll cost a fortune so I continue to put it off.

Needless to say it was a major hassle but something that I needed to get done in preparation for band practice tomororow. Brandon's sister Erin has moved back in town and she wants to come over and work on some songs for her band. (I'm adamantly not joining another band. I'll run the mixer and Adobe Audition but that's it. I will not pick up my guitar.)

So I don't mind them using my space. I just have to keep drinks stocked. Which got me thinking about something. You know when you go over to someone's house and they offer you something to drink? You reply, "Yes, what have you got?" And then they list, "Diet Soda, Water, Iced Tea, Milk". Everyone always lists milk but when does anyone take them up on it? "I would love a nice tall glass of 2%" doesn't not come out of your mouth. You are not Beaver Cleaver.

Force Feed

There is guy in another congregation who has turned his basement into a guy's playroom. Big screen TV for the football games, pool and poker tables, and a refrigerator full of beer. When a new guy comes over the joke is to get him to try this beer called Alpha King. Since it is really heavy on the hops it'll work over the typical Bud Light drinker who despises aftertaste and craves smoothness. So one time I went over there and it was my turn to be iniated and handed a bottle of Alpha King. I drank it and was fine with it and enjoyed the grapefruit notes and creamy mouthfeel.

So I was sitting here and finding it odd that I can drink beer that will turn a normal person green but I struggle with diet soda. I really need to develop a taste for diet soda. Half my calorie intake each day is soda. I drop the soda, I drop the weight. It would seem simple but I just can't. It seems odd to cry addiction about soda but I can't think about any food or drink that I need, NEED everyday.

I used to despise pickles. Then I gradually started leaving them on my burgers instead of picking them off. Now I'm slowly starting to get in the habit to eat them out of the jar. (I'm retching at I type this.) But they are 0 calories a pop so I need to like them. So I choke them down and wait for the day where I start to love them.

I used to loathe coffee. But now I down a half-a-pot a day as soda substitute while at work. I'm getting more caffeine (My right eye is twitching as I write ths.) but hardly any of the calories.

People think there is a big magic bullet to losing weight. Adkins. South Beach. It's all a load of crap. The trick (if you can even call it that) to losing weight can be distilled down to "eat less, excercise more". And if health is your concern as well as being trim you can add, "eat right." It's so simple, yet so hard sometimes.

It really requires a psyche out. That's why anorectics succeed where so many others fail. They totally work over their minds where what is hard becomes a way of life. If you can brainwash yourself like that then you'll have little problem losing the weight. But then you are kind of stuck in that mode for the rest of your life. Once you lose the weight it isn't about staying at a healthy weight you've gotta keep cutting and trimming and slicing.

I just want to fit into the shirts at Express and have a thinner face. That's all.

I was also thinking about eating meat and how it is contrary to nature. God didn't originally give humans animals to eat. He gave them fruits and nuts. And even when they sinned he didn't give them animals. He told them to eat the vegetation of the field. But somewhere between the time of Adam and the day of Noah humans started eating flesh. Note this is the time that humans started getting really wicked. Some unsupported sources speculate that the Nephilim started the whole meat eating thing and even began eating humans.

But didn't God give Noah animals to eat after the flood? Yes. But perhaps this is something he tolerates instead of something he enjoys. Kind of like he used to allow such things as polygamy which now he condemns.

It's really nothing to be overly concerned about but just something I was considering. I'm not ready to jump on the vegan boat just yet.

Babel-gone

Our world grows multi-cultural by the day but the language barriers exist the same as always. The plan? Invent a new common language.

Really it can't be that hard to create a new, better language from scratch. We already have examples like Star Trek's Klingon and Tolkien's Elvish. I'm sure some think-tank with linguistics majors could get together and churn out something.

To be fair to all nations this new language (heretofore referred to as 'Basic') shouldn't be based on any existing language (however it would make sense that the written form utilize some variation of the roman alphabet). Basic should be made relatively easy to learn. Grammatical and spelling rules shall remain consistant. Letters will only represent one 'sound' (For instance 'c' as in 'cat' and not as in 'cent'). No homnyms will be allowed.

Basic will be taught in school starting from Grade-1 through High School as an extension of the existing curriculum. All existing foreign language course (i.e., spanish, french, english) will be not be allowed. At the university level foreign language courses are exceptable; but, the emphasis will not be on communicating with others. These classes should focus on these languages as they relate to classical literature, historical studies, and etymology.

10 years from the time Basic studies are started in elementary school a phase out of preexisting languages will begin. Television broadcasts will be required to contain mandatory Basic subtitles to begin to allow for a familiarity to develop among the populace. 20 years in, all classes at the high school and university level will be taught in Basic. Next all official government documentation and business shall be conducted in Basic. Magazines, news journals, and Internet portals will be encouraged to move toward using Basic. Popular literature (pulp-fiction, romance, mystery) will be printed in Basic. (Other forms of literature will be allowed to be written in preexisting languages to retain cultural heritage.) TV and movies will move to basic only. (Hollywood should jump at this as a cost cutting measure that will allow them to export their wares without costly overdubs.)

Of course all of the above is simply a dream. National pride and fear of cultural loss would prevent this from happening. I still remember the dismal failure of the metric system in the US.

Poker Face

Rebekah and I got invited to one of those Witness-Christmas-Eve-Parties. I should clarify: This party not involve any of the traditional elements. No sing-song carols. No chestnuts on an open fire. No egg-nog. It's one of those everyone is off work the next day (and no one is going out in service or to the meeting the next morning) so let's get together and stay up super late. To further seperate this from a Christmas Eve celebration they have added a poker tournament. Not lose your money or clothes poker but compete for prizes and hope you're not stumbling a recovering gambling addict in the process poker. Because, afterall nothing says "seperate from the world" like a Texas Holdem tournament.

I'm dragging. I don't feel like work in the morning. Having a day off really makes you hate work. I usually come off my week vacations ready to retire. And speaking of which it looks we are doing the Disney thing again this year. We decided to invite Rebekah's parents since now that her dad is reinstated we haven't really done anything with them. It seemed like a nice thought at the time but it quickly turning into a major hassle. Rebekah's mom is so fly-by-night that it is annoying. We need to have everything confirmed and we're still at the planning stages.

But I've already got my plans confirmed. While Rebekah goes Disney lapel pin hunting and Mina chases after character autographs I'm gonna see how many pictures of cute Japanese girl tourists that I can snap. I have Rebekah's blessing because she shares my fetish to a certain extent. "Sumimasen Ga. Fotoo Kudasai."

I really, really like this new song we came up with called Dial Tone. To quote N/A, "the way to move a room is a direct X plugin known as the antares autotune".
Agreed. Agreed. Agreed.

The only other random thought I had today was that I hate commerce. The world tends to hold our capitalist government on a pedestal but I fear it is ready to collapse. The system just isn't working (no surprise) . Fortunately I haven't bought into it. I'm really looking forward to a theocracy even if I can't see it.

Winter Blah

The other day I stepped outside and was greeted by falling thermometer followed by falling snow flakes followed by falling mood. I want to be like a bear and hibernate all winter. I want to tuck into a nice warm spot and wake when the weather improves. Humans weren't made to scratch around in the snow.

So I almost, almost, bought a turkey last week but then chickened out. It was too much of an undertaking to try and attempt to cook it despite the low prices. Almost.

Tonight I saw Derek and Rikki again for this first time in a year. They are up visiting from Atlanta. I spent so much time with Derek when he was around but I sit there tonight not having much to say. Then again our whole relationship revolved around computer coding so we have nothing really substantial to talk about. So we chatted about SQL Server and bored each other silly.

This morning we went out in service with Tom Davis and he told us that Alicia had just had a baby. I don't think about it too often but I really miss her sometimes. We used to fight all the time. But even though she pisses me off I have a love for her. I wrote a downer screenplay about her but am waiting for the happy sequel where everything works out.

Pink Lady

Yesterday Mina was still sick so I bailed on work for the afternoon to watch her and felt really bad in doing so. When I worked at my last job I would jump at the chance to miss work but now I can barely bring myself to call off.

I took the opportunity to clean out my drum machine. With all of the new songs we are making, the DR770 was getting cluttered. I really need to figure MIDI out so I can dump the contents of the drum machine out on my harddrive as backup but I'm not at that point just yet.

Later Brandon came over and we made good progress on his new song -- Dial Tone. After so many dodgy tunes (like our most recent Video Vertigo) it is good to be on the verge of churning out something sweet for a change.

He told me that his sister and her husband are moving back in a couple of weeks and looking forward to playing. I swear I'm gonna have to start knocking down walls to accomidate all of the amps.

I forgotten to mention that over the weekend I was treated to a very cool apple variety called pink lady. It is the cosmopolitan version of the apple. So unique that it's barely an apple.

Final Fantasy X-2

So Friday night Rebekah says, "I really want a game to play."
And I say, "Oh yeah. Is anything cool out?"
And she replies, "Final Fantasy X-2 just came out today."
So I jumped in the car and headed over to Wal-Mart to grab a copy.

For the first time in ages we actually got invited to go to someone's house for dinner and fellowship. This was quickly curtailed by Mina getting sick yet again.

Thus weekend was divided between nursing a sick child, playing video games, and working on/practicing our set list.

Celebrity

I'm sick of the culture of celebrity in this country. The news revolves around celebrities (Michael Jackson) and creates new ones (Jessica Lynch). Honestly, the only way I would care if Michael Jackson sexually molested some kid would be if he lived on my block. Otherwise, how does it affect me in the slightest?

Rebekah and I brainstormed a cool new television show concept inspired by an old Adam Sandler sketch. The show would be called stalkHER. The host of the show would randomly pick out an individual and give her name a picture on television. The television audience would then be invited to follow said individual around and report on her activities and take pictures. Whomever gets the best "scoop" would win a prize.

It would combine the reality concepts of the Osbornes/Anna Nicole with the Paparazzi and an old fashioned game show. It would probably get old after one season but WHAT A SEASON!

Credit

I've got my very first credit card! An official, honest-to-god, master card with my name embossed on the front! The catch? It's a company credit card. So I can't really charge, charge, charge myself into debt like the rest of America.

The problem with the United States is that they make it practically impossible to live without a credit card. For instance you can't rent a car without a credit card. They force you into having one and then once it's in your hand it takes real strength of will not to use it.

True I have no credit but I also have no credit card debt. That is very, very cool. If I want to buy something I have to save up for it or blow our bill money.

--

So last night at the book study I quoted Eric Cartman in my comment for Rebekah's benefit. I didn't have the audacity to use his voice but she picked up on it. "Whatever! I'll do what I want!"

--

Brandon and I are working on a new song called, "Dial Tone" toward the completion of the album.

Meanwhile Rebekah and I are working hard to get a set together to play live. We really want to play the Nuclear Gopher show whenever that happens but Brandon is hesitant to leave town. We need a backup plan so either way we will play.

If I had a million dollars

I once read that Michael Jordan never wears the same pair of sneakers twice. If I had a million dollars I would do something similar. But, not with Nike shoes but with underwear. I recently was treated to a new 6-pack of Fruit of the Loom (mid-rise). It felt so good to slip into a new drawers with a waistband that actually had elasticity. To be covered by something lacking holes. I wish I could have that experience everyday.

Upon receiving my new briefs I pulled out a dental shade chart and selected the underwear that would be retired to the garbage. The dingiest were the first to go. My goal in the coming months is to replace all my old pairs.

Alas, I do not suffer from some Horatio Alger fantasy. I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never have a million dollars. I think I'm gonna opt for the next option. I need to get Hanes to sponsor me. I need to become the poster boy for Fruit of the Loom. Sure I may have to do some revealing publicity shots of me in the product but it would be a small price to pay to wake up everyday and be greeted by unadulterated cotton briefs.

But how to get sponsored? I have the personality of a mime. I'll look to Jared Fogel for inspiration. He is currently writing a new book describing how an average unappealing Joe like himself has become a corporate icon for nothing at all.

Minority

It was free HBO weekend on DirecTV so I caught the last twelve minutes of Minority Report. If there ever was a movie that you can't understand unless you watch the whole thing that was it. I was so confused.

Petty Booka

I'll spare you a long-winded diatribe this entry and just get to goods.

The Best Band In Japan? (video)

. . .

Well it happened. Mind you it's not officially sanctioned condemnation but it did get a barb tossed at it in the public talk Sunday. I'll quote to the best of my memory.

"But what does the world want you to be? The world wants you to be Queer Eye for the Straight Guy"

--

I'm trying to write a children's book for my sister and recognising my limitations. It's hard. I've got something but it just isn't that great and I'm too picky about my writing to just let loose something substandard--as opposed to my music making. (With that I'll just assault your ears with any old two-bit off-tune ditty.)

So I'm no Madonna. That is to say I'm a substandard musician but I can't cross over and write a decent kid's book. I went to Border's Friday to take a look at Jeanette Winterson's The King of Capri. I was hoping I could get some pointers and if all else fails downright plagerise.

They didn't have the book so I spent time reading excerts from Michael Moore's new one while Rebekah and Mina looked around. I really should avoid Mr. Moore as he is bad for my political neutrality. He also tends to stir my expat wanderlust. But thirdly after I am done having a knee-jerk reaction to the text I really start longing for God's Kingdom more. So maybe it is a good thing to read political critisism?

While out we picked up Belle and Sebastian's new CD. I was hoping to buy a copy at the show for cheap but they didn't have any. Border's was asking $18.99 (ouch) so we got a copy at Best Buy for $15.99 (ouch). It is a really great album with only a few dodgy songs.

--

So I'm feeling a renewed sense of spirituality. Like many people my spirituality tends to resemble the stock market. I'll be strong for a certain period of time and then I'll bottom out. I really lack endurance. But I feel something so I'm going to try to capture the moment and build on it and see what happens. It feels good to be a bull again.

--

The study Sunday was talking about how persecution can just rear up inexplicably at a moments notice. How true. I was reading about a fancy French restaraunt in California(?) that was burnt to the ground after the Chirac opposed the Iraq war. It is so easy for politics (and especially neutrality) to cause people to act irrationally. One minute everything is fine and the next you are standing in the ashes of a burnt down building and wondering what happened.

Journals

The other day I went by my old High School and visited with a literature teacher who taught me a decade ago. One of the young sisters in my hall said that she was retiring pretty soon and I wanted to say hi before then. She was the sole teacher I have any fond memories of - well apart from drama teacher I had a mild crush on.

So we talked for a while. She lamented the state of the city and how it affected the schooling. The budget is such that all the classes of subtance are being stripped away will only the barest of essentials being left behind (sports evidentally one of them.) She has struggled to keep her Advanced Studies Literature/History class in spite of this. I really want to be a supporter of public schools but situations like this reinforce that in many ways the system just isn't working anymore. (It also solidifies that we need to get Mina into a new school system ASAP. Montessori is getting more and more palatable.)

We also talked a bit about journals. I didn't remember initially but she has always had her class keep journals. I must've kept one but what I wrote about is beyond me. We talked about a guy she knew. He was involved in a bad situation where he accidentally shot his best friend with a gun. The very next day he came to school and this teacher didn't know quite how to react. Buying time, trying to figure out what to do, she asked the class to pull out their journals and write. This is what he wrote:

"Today I go to the funeral of my best friend whom I shot and killed."

That might just be one of the purest things I've heard in a long time.

Belle & Sebastian

Belle & Sebastian played last night at the Pageant in support of their new album Dear Catastrophe Waitress.

I had to work late to cover for a vacationing coworker so I left directly from work to go to the show as it seemed too much of a hassle to drive home just to leave again. We got to the place and bought our tickets and drove a couple blocks down to dine at Seki's. Seki was really not in the budget but since we were practically right new door we decided to go.While we waited for the door to open for the show we dined on sushi, soba, and tempura.

At the Pangeant once again we had Mina with us so we got the obligatory stares as we entered the venue. After hassling us for an extra two dollars for a "minor surcharge" this guy came buy and rattled off something about "protecting little one's ears" and gave me some earplugs lest the ear splitting din of violins and cellos and acoustic guitars harm my daughter.

Rasupitna opened for Belle & Sebastian. They were very much a novelty two cello, one drum three-piece. Their songs were reminiscant of Tori Amos. And just like Tori the in between song batter and schtick grew old quickly. In the beginning it solicitating forced laughter but toward the end people just stared. As far as opening bands are they weren't bad. They held their own and were at least interesting to watch aswellas provided nice background music.

As Rasputina finished the place was filling up. The girl the next table over commented on how surprised she was to see this many people for B&S. I rolled my eyes at the comment. Yes, Belle & Sebastian are less well known than say Britney Spears but they are not shrouded in this bastion of indie obscurity that a lot of these kids would wish to assume. Sorry, listening to Belle & Sebastian no longer makes you different and cool.

We got Mina a Belle & Sebastian sticker by her request. She's saving it (and others) for a guitar case she says.

Belle and Sebastian took the stage and filled it to capacity. They had a least twelve people playing and suddenly the $25.00 ticket price became understandable. Everytime a new song started it seemed that new band members were popping in and out.

I came to Belle and Sebastian late so I do not have a lot of their albums. I only have a couple and some EPs. So out of the two hours that they played I only recognized a few songs. Beautiful, Photo Jenny, Judy and The Dream of Horses are the ones that come to mind. But it didn't matter, all the songs sounded wonderful.

The band started the set kind of stuffy but gradually they loosened up a bit. A girl tossed her bra onstage and Stuart picked up and said, "It's brown. How indie of you." They also did this bit where they invited someone from the audience to come up to the stage and sing a cover song (they called it a "party piece") with them. They hauled this girl named Amanda off the floor and she suggested they do Abba's Dancing Queen. After a few minutes of deliberation they decided to give a shot. The band did admirably at playing that song on the fly. My cynical self would normally conclude that Amanda was a band plant but. 1.) she didn't have accent. 2.) She couldn't really sing. It was fun and got lots of applause. I wonder if they do this often and what other songs have come up.

It was great show and was only marred by a drunken idiot in the balcony who kept screaming out his request, namely Century of Fakers, over and over and over again. What I find more annoying is the people who yell back, "they can't change the setlist for you!" and "let them play what they want." (Amanda if you are reading this that second actually came out of someone's mouth....again.) They come across so whiny.

After only one encore (sadly) the show let out and we stepped outside to get drenched by the cold November rain. We drove home to get what little bit of sleep we could salvage before waking for work and school.

Peppers

I had some chipoltle peppers leftover from my meatballs so I marinated chicken breasts in them. Last night I attempted fajitas with the chicken. I usually add onion and red bell pepper. But, since I only had an onion I had to improvise. I substituted red chilis for the missing red bells. If you check the Scoville heat scale you see what a terrible substitution this. The fajitas were hot. Not just burn your mouth hot; but, puke your guts out and scald your esophagus in the process hot.

Today a coworker brought in some peppers that he called "pepper peckers". He was only being mildly obscene. There proper botanical name is "penis pepper". They get the name from their uncanny resemblance to the male phallis. They are supposed to be pretty good. I might attempt a salsa or something with them and see what happens.

--

Last night Brandon came over and we started working on a new song, "video vertigo". I liked the title of one my journal entries I decided to incorporate it in a song. It's funny how many songs develop from a cool title. I've been waiting for my opportunity to incorporate the Konami code into a song and the time has come. I might even name-drop Justin Bailey.

With Brandon's approval I put another song up on 6a2. It's called album filler...er...rather...Dividing Sight. The song isn't that great but I love Brandon's vocals and (starts patting his own back) my guitar outro is awesome! I don't know how in the world I did it. I was just screwing around and somehow it came out. I doubt I could duplicate it.

Television

This weekend went by super fast and nothing really of note happened. We have a lot of money tied up in seeing bands over the next few weeks so we didn't have any cash to go do anything. It was pretty much just time to loaf around the house and watch TV.

I caught the season opener for The Simpsons, my favorite TV show. As for the episode, there's been better, there's been worse. I'm glad to see this series keeps going on.

I watched Saturday Night Live for the first time in a while. I think this season might be one of those really bad seasons that almost gets the show cancelled. As much as the show wants to tout itself as having "not ready for primetime players" it really works on the star principle and all the stars have left. As a sidenote, Maya Rudolf is cute. I think I saw her live in concert when she was with the Rentals but I'm not quite certain.

I checked out "Viva La Bam" a spinoff of "Jackass". It is has a lot of heart. Primarily it's about a kid, Bam Margera, driving his parents, Phil and April, crazy. However there is this subtext of love between the family that is endearing.

I got caught up in this show on the Discovery channel that was supposed to be a historical analysis of Mary, the mother of Jesus. I don't know why I bother to watch these programs when they just irritate me. They start from the standpoint that the Bible's account it just this big inflated fairy tale and then do whatever they can to present a completely opposite patched together guesswork account of their own. They kept sighting these supposed contradictions in the Bible where there were none. It was only accounts where the Bible contradicts the well known Christmas tale and where it contradicts the Catholic apocryphal version of Mary. The one point that it did make which might be valid is that Mary may have been young when she married Joseph as was the custom. The show guessed that she was twelve years old; however, I think twelve is really a stretch for child-bearing age even today when puberty begins much sooner. Sixteen or so may have been feasible.

Two Publishers

There was this weird guy at our hall, John Lynch, that had recently become a publisher. It always bothered me that even though he was a publisher the friends never really dignified him by referring to him as "Brother" Lynch. Well last night they finally did so when they announced that Brother Lynch had died. I only really talked to him once. Out in service we talked about the director Ed Wood. John had thrown out some reference to Plan 9 From Outerspace and I picked up on it. He was surprised. I really don't mind death but it's kind of a bummer that he wasn't able to get baptized before he went.

And on to another publisher, Prince. If he is serious about the whole thing that's all well and good, no harm, no foul. If this is another "change your name to a symbol" type-stunt then...then what? I know some people get all excited when celebrities become Witnesses as if that adds a level of legitimacy to our religion. The bad thing is that in the truth there is no room for celebrity. These former-celebrities will have a hard enough time adjusting to being meek and mild without the friends giving them celebrity attention. (In retrospect I probably shouldn't even have wrote this.)

I can't believe it's Friday already!

Video Vertigo

I used to be a hardcore video-gamer. As a kid I have fond memories of getting a new game and playing it nearly 24 hours a day, not even stopping to eat, trying to negotiate a nintendo controller and bowl of cap'n crunch.

My video gaming has curtailed somewhat. I still buy the new systems but only tend to play with them when really exciting games come out--in a nutshell new installments of the Final Fantasy and Zelda series I loved as a youth.

And then there is Tony Hawk - Pro Skater. I love, love those games and when I saw the commercial for the latest installment Tony Hawk's Underground I knew I had to make a trip up to Blockbuster and check it out. I rented it and played it for an hour last night until motion sickness set in and my thumb felt like it was ready to fall off.

This morning we locked the keys in the house. I had to borrow a ladder and send Mina in through the tiny bathroom window. What an ordeal!

That's A Spicy Meatball

Last night we had snack night at the book study. I made chipoltle flavoured meatballs. This provided the opportunity to use my food processor in new and exciting ways! I fired up the Cuisinart and ground my own pork. The meatballs were a hit and that made me very happy.

It was the highpoint of a bad night. I found that I was inexplicably depressed and on the verge of tears. I hate it when that happens for no reason.

Found out some good news. A second Kristin Hersh show has been added in Chicago on the 15th @ 10:00pm. So now Rebekah and I can catch the Aislers Set at the House of Blues at 7:00pm and then cruise over to the Old Town Folk School to catch Kristin. As an added bonus we got front row center seats for the Kristin show. As a super added bonus Mina is being watched by her aunt that weekend. Here's to good music and staying out late and getting falling down drunk (all except for the last part)! Rah! Rah!

Irritation

Sunday at the meeting this older sister comes up and asks me (straight-faced), "Are you one of those little people?". I soooo wanted to reply, "I prefer the term midget!". But, I didn't. I played the role of the mild-tempered brother and shrugged it off with a smile. Here it is Tuesday and it is still irritating. I hate how people feel they can make any comment about a man's physical appearance that nobody would ever make to a lady. How many times have you heard someone comment to a guy about him not having hair? How many times have you heard someone say, "it looks like you're gaining a little weight"? Arrrg.

--

Last night Brandon came over and we worked on the new song. We added a cheesy organ to the mix and some sin swoops. It sounds like 60's garage rock or something. Wild.

MP3

I downloaded my first album the other day and then another and then another. I'm no stranger to .mp3 downloads. Once upon a time I used Napster and when it went away I switched to alternatives. However, I would just download a few songs and if I liked them well enough I would go out and buy the CD. From what I hear of the RIAA presumably I was the only one who bought a CD based on an illegal download.

MP3's to me do not seem substantial. The album art is so much a part of the music experience that I do not get the same feeling from a CD-R with the band name scrawled on the cover with magic marker. Perhaps this is the reason some people hang on to their vinyl for dear life and turn their noses up at CD's?

But I signed up for this service called eMusic; because they were offering a free 50 song download tryout when you signed up for the service. I really wanted the Mates of State's albums and am out of money so I decided to give it a shot. I burned a CD-R and then used the office color laser to print out some cover art to decorate my otherwise naked CD-R. Still I would rather have the official CD--but it's hard to argue with free.

--

This weekend was dreary but it was the perfect weekend to lounge about on the couch in sweatpants, drinking hot-cocoa, and watching cheesy TV. Nothing much happened of note. We cleaned the downstairs "studio" in preperation for moving some band stuff over to my house. Brandon and I determined that my house was a better setup for practicing and recording. So if the other two (members of Mostly Minus) agree we'll pull everything over to my house--drum kit, PA system, multiple amps, guitars, and many, many cords.

Rebekah and I have been working on a new song called "a(l/t)titude"--another rocker along the lines of ATMOS 206 but more fiesty. It is pretty hot and very fun to play. Brandon will come over today and we'll try to match it with a lead synth. If it works it'll be a new 6a2 song. If not it goes back in the Anthony and Rebekah other band bin.

Notes

Last night at the meeting we had the big convention review. It is always fun to revisit your notes. Ours always start out good but the quality of the note taking decays over the length of the convention. Sunday's notes left me scratching my head and wondering what an ink sketch of the extremely fat brother in the disabled section had to do with "Give God Glory".

Our congregation was giving a lot of good comments in answer to the questions in the KM. Most of us know to hang on to our notes for these Service Meeting parts. However, when we got to the question, "What scenes from the drama standout in your mind?" nobody raised their hands. The question induced silence and blank stares. Maybe the drama was not very memorable. Or perhaps since nobody thought to takes notes on the drama an answer couldn't be given.

Metrosexuality

I'm just waiting for the metrosexual trend to get big enough to solicit comment from the Watchtower. I better go get my unibrow waxed while I still can.

The oddest thing to me about the whole gay thing that is happening right now is that Gay men are more prominent and visible in entertainment then the women. Television shows about gay women have little do with their sexual escapades and the whole lesbian thing is sort of played down. The guys are flaming. For the longest time I assumed that gay women were more palatable to people then gay men.

I'm reading a lot about restoration period england. Liza Picard has an excellent book on the subject, "Restoration London". It seems back then that lesbianism was tolerated, but buggery was a capital offense.

--

Best line from last night's South Park: "Get with the times. That is soooooooooo September 10th"

Monday, Monday, Sha-la-la-la-la

Shonen Knife was playing at the Creepy Crawl last night. I didn't go because:

1.) I'm broke.
2.) The Creepy Crawl is a dive.
3.) 6a2 was getting together.

But it was all good because:

1.) It was hamburger (mmmm...burger) night and I had some bacon (mmmm...bacon) to slap on mine!
2.) 6a2 was getting together.

So we fired up the new Juno and worked on the new song. I want to call it "album filler" but we decided that "divisive sight" is probably a better title. This is probably the first song that we are writing more or less together as a group instead of one person coming up with something and the others embelishing on it. Rebekah says it has a "soul vibe" to it. It reminds me of "Three's Company" for some weird reason that I cannot comprehend.
The new synth is working great! I love it! When we go back and revisit our other songs for the album I'm sure it'll get stuck in there.

I finally got around to putting up our last song paid_program up. I've been sitting on it for some time. This sucker was hard to do and was a great learning experience. I'm not 100% happy with it and sure that it'll be changed for the album but I was soooo ready to move on. To me it has a jazzy, hip-hop feel to it.

I've got more to say about more interesting stuff but I'll spread it out over the week...

If its tangy and brown you're in cider town

Friday - I finally got the diagnosis handed down.. Hiatal Hernia. Nothing too bad. My options are:

1.) Ignore it...
2.) Treat it with medicine...
3.) Fix it with surgery

I'm going with number 1, since it isn't too bad. Everything seems to looking up finally. I'm having movements but the colour is off. (taupe)

Saturday - Went apple picking. Boring. I got clocked in the head with some apples and nearly busted my lip. Alas I did not have some Newton epithany when it happened--I only felt pain. Rebekah thought it was funny.

At the riverfront they were having this frontier thing festival. It was so disgusting. Everywhere I looked there was some hairy, pimply butt cheek poking out of some fat guy's buckskin loin cloth. The dumb part was that it was frontier times so I understood the cowboys and indians. But there were dudes running around with kilts on. I think I even saw a pirate and a gypsie. But even in the frontier times white trash is still white trash. Hoosier's were pouring Bud-light into pottery jugs to add a level of authenticity to their drunken revelry.

When I got home I tried to get a hold of someone to go out to a show with me but I didn't. I went ahead and went to the Rocket Bar in St. Louis by my lonesome. Since I was going to be a loner I decided to try to dress to impress so I wouldn't look like too much of a loser. So I put on my vintage corduroy cowboy shirt with the pearl snap buttons. Bad move! It is polyester and as we learn on Queer Eye it doesn't breathe. I was suffocating the whole night. I almost broke down and bought a band t-shirt to change into. I didn't because I hate it when people are wearing the band t-shirt, especially when they just bought it. So I suffered in silence.

I Am The World Trade Center - Interesting. The guy had a Roland 808 and he just hit a button for each song. That was the extent of the playing. After that it was just jumping around on the stage and singing through a vocoder. The girl played the tamberine and danced and sang. It was dance music so I danced.

The Thermals - Not my kind of music but they weren't bad. Probably better live than on CD. While they were playing I hung out by the entrance to catch the breeze coming in and try to cool down.

Mates of State - Pretty good. I definately could see buying their CD down the line. The gal had this awesome organ, yamaha yc 45-d. It sounded so good. The songs were interesting and nice. With just an organ and a drumkit it could get old really fast but they kept a nice pace and changed it up quite a bit. Neither one of them had an exceptional voice but they sung together sweetly.

Analog Roam

Mouse Planet finally got around to posting my trip report from February. It is pretty boring and rife with errors and omissions so please do not feel compelled to read it. Mouse Planet runs those trips reports as a travel aid to those suckers (like me) that choose to go to Disney World.

....

We got our newest eBay purchase in the mail, a later model Roland analog synth. We got a good price on it and found out why when we hooked it up. Two keys did not work at all, one key fired too loud, one key went in and out. So I did a little Internet research and downloaded instructions on how to clean the connections. Hesitantly I grabbed a screwdriver and opened the instrument. The inside was pretty dusty as could be expected from something 18 years old. We cleaned up under the keys and managed to fix it! I can't believe it.

Plague & Fire, Reading & Writing

Last night I went to the library in hopes of grabbing the last available copy of Michael Moore's new book, Dude, Where's My Country?. It was onhold when I arrived so I grabbed some books off the shelf that will be needed as I research for my next novel.

The beginning of my next novel is to be set in London during the 1660's. (Since I will be ripping off Chaucer, Dickens, and the life of Joseph Merrick in this novel it seemed appropriate have the story in England, and centered on London.) So I started reading about the plague and the london fire that swept through the region. It is really fascinating reading and I've already began to get great ideas about where my characters will fit into this world.

Rebekah has finished reading my first novel and I drained an inkpen on my grammatical mistakes. More importantly she has provided insight as to where my timing might have been vague or innacurate or where certain events and motivations may not be so clear. I knew she would hate the end of the novel because it is purposely obscure to allow for the sequel if I would ever choose to write it.

From what I gather, she hates the story and questions whether or not it would have any chance of being published. However, she does believe that it is well written and interesting. Those are all my feelings exactly.

Playstation 3

I read this neat article regarding monkeys that could use their minds to move an electronic arm to play a game. Scientists implanted a chip in their brain to allow them to interact with the electronic arm by pure thought. The article then goes on to cite the possible applications in humans such as artificial limbs.

To me the obvious application as in next generation video game systems. Forget redesigning the controller! Throw the controller out the window and just start doing chip implants. Who needs hand eye coordination when you can just have eye-mind coordination. That would be cool! Or what about for pilots? Imagine if they could control fighter craft via their mind? That would be so neat.

And Now For The Punchline ...

A Now For The Punchline...

Come to find out I was just full of crap! Who knew? My CT scan didn't show anything remarkable save for an intestinal track packed fuller than a Tokyo rush-hour train. The pain in my side was just muscle strain from trying to get it moving. A viscious circle. 12 hours on the stool and enough laxatives to unclog an elephant and I'm a new man. I literally could see my bloated belly reducing in size before my eyes.

Violence

I saw a violent movie last night because I heard it was good. Now I don't believe that I'm any lofty standard when it comes to entertainment. If there ever was a weak spot it would be that. However, I just don't enjoy violence for the sake of violence. This film was simply about violence and the story was just an excuse to go from one violent episode to the next. It glorified it. As a rule I will not see any movie that has a gun displayed on the theatre poster (the exception is Star Wars of course, lasers being different than bullets). But I saw this movie because the poster only had a sword and Crouching Tiger was super cool. It left a bad taste in my mouth but the soundtrack sure was awesome!

Smooth Move

Ex-Lax. She gave me ex-lax.

So I was wrong. Best case scenario is still constipation, hence the ex-lax, but the worse case scenario as it turns out is cancer. There are a hundred other things in between. My grandmother just died of colon cancer so there is a huge red flag up. So I had to get some x-rays taken and if there is no change by Monday she wants me to get a cat-scan on my gut and I may have to have a video camera rammed up by arse or something for them to get a closer look at whatever is stopping me up.

The doctor kind of looked worried.

This weekend is the circuit assembly..

Crap

You never really appreciate what you have until it's gone. I woke up today and I couldn't move my bowels.

Yesterday, I had a sharp pain between my groin and my gut. I just kind of ignored it and hoped it would go away. Today I can't ignore it. I feel blocked, pinched, and backed up.

I made an appointment for the doctor tommorrow. Best case scenario she tells me I'm just constipated and gives me a laxative. Worst case scenario I have a hernia and will end up under the knife.

I don't mind seeing the doctor; but, I don't like having to drop trou in front of her. I just noticed today that she isn't an "M.D." but a "D.O.". I'll have to ask her is she can recommend a real doctor for me to start seeing. Maybe not. She kind of has this crazed stare that is disturbing.

Junk Shops

Yesterday on my lunch break I dropped in on some antique stores along the river in Alton. I'm kind of obsessed with looking for a combo organ and figured I might get lucky and find one stashed away in one of these shops.

These stores give me the creeps. They are in these old industrial buildings that are falling in on themselves. The buildings have been crudely sectioned off for antique dealers. So it's old run down items inside old run down buildings sold by old run down people.

Some stores are nice and organized whereas others are simply piles upon piles of refuse. Sometimes these piles provide a hedge-maze affect where you turn a corner and are suddenly at loss about how to find the exit. One shop was heavy into the religious memorabilia and I turned round to find myself staring face to face with a chipped wooden statue of St. Christopher and baby Jesus, St. Agnes and child Mary in porcelain, and a bleeding heart oil painting of Jesus nearby. It was kind of eery.

I never did find anything useful as I am into mod-items from the 60's and 70's and these stores tend to not have anything that "new".

--

Rebekah is reading my book right now and discovering error after error that my eyes simply do not see. I read right on through. It's always errors of omission. I tend to leave out words like "the", "a", "of". Almost like ASL or something.

--

Brandon has been giving out CD after CD of 6a2 music. If it were up to me I wouldn't; but I don't terribly mind. One thing is clear everyone seems to like "Trendsetters" the best. I told him when we recorded it that it would be the stupid novelty song that everyone likes. Pee-diddy. Poo-diddy. Har Har. It is my least favorite song. I think I may hate it. The token novelty song never does any band any good unless you are prepared to just do albums comprised of only funny songs, like They Might Be Giants. I am not but I can be a good sport and go along with it occasionally... Maybe I'll even join in. My next song is officially titled, "Poo-poo, wee-wee, smelly fart" ... or not

Hair

Every now and again I feel the need to reinvent myself--dimestore makeover.

I can't help but to notice that the current hair styles are pulling from the late seventies-early eighties. The emo look if you will. So I thought I would try to grow my hair out. I needed a hair cut two weeks ago but I resisted and resisted but I don't think I can hold out any longer. My hair is just a mess and uncomfortable. The dandruff that I always get in fall doesn't add anything.

I'd rather be unstylish then to have a mop of hair sitting on my head.

Parent's House

We went to my parent's house this weekend. Truth told, I could've done without it. They should be thankful for Rebekah because she always twists my arms until I consent to visiting. I am not a very family oriented person.

So we went down on Friday after I got off from work. It is a two and half hour drive which was made tolerable by the new Club 8 CD I got in the mail.

In order to get to my parent's house you have to descend down this windy rock road that weaves through thick trees. They have this country house with a creek that runs by their house.

Saturday I woke up and drove into the nearest town to waste time because there is literally nothing to do at my parents. Rolla is a college town; however, unlike other college towns there is absolutely nothing going on. No coffee-houses with psudeo-intellectual ramblings. No rock clubs. No record stores. No anti-war protesting. It's weird. I suppose because it is an engineering school that the majority of the enrollment is foreigners who stick to themselves and do foreign things after-hours and on the weekend in their little foreign communities.

In Rolla the only thing to do is to go to Super Wal-Mart. In all honesty there are hicks that take their girlfriends on dates there. Since it is hunting season practically everyone, man, woman, and child had their camouflage on. As if to suggest that they had to blend in and be ready lest some twelve-point buck jumps out from behind an underware rack.

I went to this pawn shop and Rebekah and I found this case which said 'yamaha piano' on the price tag. We tried to open it to see what was in it but one of the latches wouldn't budge. The 16-year old granddaughter of the owner came over and spent a good fifteen minutes trying to jimmy the latch open until finally it clicked.

It turned out to be a Yamaha CP-30 electric piano. It was neat and would've looked awesome on stage. The price-tag said $250 which was more than I had to give for it. However the owner told us we could have it for $150. I'm really looking for a combo organ or string-synth right now but the price made me consider getting it. We probably would've but the the thing weighed 100lbs and was much too big to fit in our little car so we opted out of it.

The girl was pretty nice and made me jealous when she said that she had a lot of guitars at her house. That her grandfather just let her take home whatever she liked. Rebekah asked whether or not she was in a band. She said that she didn't play guitar she just liked to hang them on her wall.

My brother and his wife were coming over for a weiner roast that afternoon so we went back to my folk's house. He is into indian artifacts and was hiking up to a nearby cave to sift for arrowheads. Mina lamented that she never gets to see "feather indians" just "dot indians" which was comical. I went with him for part of the way with Rebekah and Mina. The walk to the cave takes you through a big pasteur with woods on one side and a bluff-face on the other. It felt like Lord of the Rings and I could just imagine these big epic helicopter camera shots as Rebekah and I ran through the field recited lines from the movies and dodging cow crap. It's easy to be geeky when you're in the middle of nowhere.

That night we had a fire. Rebekah made the chili I mentioned a coupled days ago. I discovered how versatile it is. I ate it as chili-mac and then used it on a campfire hot-dog and then used it as tortilla chip dip. Mmmmmm chili. We rented the "Mighty Wind" DVD and I enjoyed watching it again as well as the deleted scenes.

Sunday I woke up and went to their meeting. There was a chinese sister there named "Ang Lee" and everytime she got called on I laughed because I kept thinking about the movie director. They have a chinese study group at the hall because they get a lot of interest from the chinese student community. Most of the kids are atheists and they study simply to learn English.

After the meeting we went to my brother's house for chicken and then back home...

Bling, Bling

"When the money keeps rolling in you don't ask why." - Evita

We got a couple of rebate checks in the mail at the beginning of last week for some paint purchases last spring. It was nothing special, just twelve bucks. But it was unexpected so it was neat and ended up being an omen.

a bit later Rebekah found work and I got a raise. All in the same week! We've been on a budget forever and always living check to check with just a little bit left over for extra things. And by extra things I mean a new CD or book every now again, nothing extravagant.

It'll be weird to have extra money each week. Extra money that is not tied to bills. Extra money to just blow. I've made more money before and it seems like we just ate out more. I'd really like to use the money for something more worthwhile because there is no telling how long it'll last.

Maybe a few home improvement projects. Perhaps some new furnishings. New clothes? So many possibilities. Maybe we'll just save it for the big expensive Tokyo trip I've never been able to do yet. I don't know. For some reason I'm not materialistic so I have trouble picturing what we could buy. We've been strapped for cash for so long I don't even know.

But first things are first... take care of debt. We owe the other half of our property taxes and then we owe my mother-in-law for some money we borrowed from her. Then we have to pay off the remaining balance on our upcoming vacation package but after that....

I'm Gonna Drink Bacardi Like ...

It's my birthday. Please do not fear that I'm celebrating it. I hate it! I turn 27 today. I really feel like It's all downhill after 24.

Things I like about getting older. Getting smarter and developing my skills.

Things I don't like about getting older. Getting fatter and being out of touch with what is hip and youthful.

To quote Winterson, "Time is a great deadener."

My sister used to do a comic strip and three years back she drew this:

Freaks

I love freaks but I cannot really appreciate them like people once did. There aren't any real "freak shows" any more where human oddities are on display. You have pretenders like the "Jim Rose Circus Side Show". I'm sorry but a guy dangly lead weights from his testacles is not the same as a boy with flipper feet. Human oddities are delegated to spot appearances on Maury Povich. It gets them exposure but it hardly provides a living like it once did.

It is early October and the radio is filling with ads for haunted houses. If I had the time and money (I have neither) I would like to have an old fashioned carnival freak show during the Fall season. I want carnival barkers in top hats luring in passersby. I want dog faced boys. I want living skeletons. I want pickled punks, mummified mermaids, and pinheads. I want to have geeks biting the heads of chickens. It would be splendid!

There is quickly coming a time when such huge variations in humanity will be erased. Is it wrong to appreciate them while they are still around?

--

Unrelated: I burned a ream of paper and printed out my novel. Being able to hold it and feel its weight makes it seem more real then when it had existed as a Word document. I'm going to let Rebekah read it and give me her 2 cents. I'm dedicated the novel to three people. One has read it, one will read it soon, one may never read it. In her column this month Jeanette Winterson talks about how it takes a while to become detached from a book you have written. During the writing you invest so much of yourself it is hard to look at it objectively or see it as something seperate from you. That's where I'm at now. It needs to be edited, badly, but now is not the time. I really need to look at it again in a few months and see what I think.

Mummy the Peepshow

I was just looking over Mummy The Peepshow's 2003 USA Tour Diary last night. It's cute in that engrish sort of way.

I even made it in one of their pictures...kind of, sort of. I'm stage front, right in the middle.

Food Addiction

From time to time I find myself addicted to certain foods. Right now I'm addicted to these Pilsbury chocolate-chip cookies. I almost hate to buy them because I cannot control my eating of them. However, I gave in last week because they were on sale and I couldn't resist. Saturday my dinner consisted exclusively of milk and cookie while I watched "The Two Towers" on pay-per-view.

Rebekah's addiction is the chili 3-way from Steak 'n Shake. When we go out to eat and I ask her where she wants to dine; she always wants Steak 'n Shake. To which I always make the same lame double entendre "I believe I'm in the mood for a 3-way too." She tried to make this fabulous item at home using the canned (yuck) Steak 'n Shake chili that they sell at the supermarket. It didn't quite work. Her sister made this awesome chili at the family reunion which was a real close match. So I suggested she attempt it again last night using that recipe. It was about a 95% match! I think if she just used less cumin and we ground up our own steak it would be dead-on.

--

This is not really related to the topic. Rebekah and I started working on what I thought was the next 6a2 song. However, it is way too mellow and breazy to fit in on second thought. ATMOS 206, our last song, barely fit the 6a2 style. And then we have other songs which won't work as 6a2 songs as well. So I suggested we record them and set them aside for something else. We'll probably just use a temp drum track to keep beat and then sub in my sister on drums when she has the chance to come down and record (you are reading this aren't you?). This project really needs to be guitar, bass, and drums with slight embellishments of other instruments here and there. The plan (right now) is to have a theme EP (or record depending on our productivity.) I'm stingy with the details because I always fear they'll get swiped up.

--

This isn't on topic either. I'm about ready to lay my novel aside for two months as per a suggestion by Stephen King. I don't really see him as any ideal to reach toward however this one bit of advice made sense. After you are done with writing put the book away for a while and then look at it later with fresh eyes when you are going to start the edit. So in the meantime I'm gearing up for my 3rd screenplay, working title is "Mental Note". When I set out to write a script I usually try to write it so that if I had the time and means later I could film it. Well this story involves a girl with down syndrome and two spider monkeys so it's immediately out of the realm of possibility for a future production. The genre is dark comedy along the lines of Solondz "Welcome to the Dollhouse." I'm hoping it will be a fun write. The novel has been such a long, dreary chore that I need something refreshing.

Excert

At about eleven o’clock we stopped at a dim diner. A little greasy-spoon affair with truckers winding down and moonlighting housewives pouring coffee thick and black like used motor oil. Smoke hung in the air and had stained everything nicotine yellow. Everyone fat, everyone slow-even the flies could only mange a precursory float, barely hanging, drifting on the air like bloated zeppelins. Christopher and me walked in looking like lithe aliens. We took a look. We took a booth-ripped of course and hastily “repaired” with green duct tape.


Christopher surprised me an ordered the entire menu like a death row inmate on his last night. Granted it was only a worn single page (yellowed of course) but it was still impressive. I raised my eyebrow quizzically. He shrugged it off.


“I’m hungry. I haven’t eaten since…. this morning?”


“Yeah and even then you had mine too.”


“You’re not hungry are you?”


The secret is that I am hungry. I could snap at any time. I could eat the layers of grease off the griddle in this pit. Every second is a fight against flesh.


“No Daddy, I’m not hungry. Although I could go for some gum I didn’t think to pack a toothbrush.”


“Drink some coffee.” He nudges a mug toward me and the content seems to jiggle like Jello.


“This late? I need to sleep.”


“There’s still a long drive ahead of us.”


“Where are we going?”


“The City.”


“Why?”



“To find you a place to stay.”


Christopher has been beating around the bush ever since we left the church in the morning. I’ll all for adventure but I’d at least like a handle on my destination. I think he senses my apprehension.


“Don’t worry, I think I know of place where you can hang out for a while and clear your head. You know, get your wits about you and prepare for your ministry. Kind of like me. When I got out of the seminary I spent a year wandering around Europe. Even Christ needed his forty-days away in the mountains.”


I smile for his sake and shrug off my wandering mind. “I just wish I could’ve went home for my toothbrush.”

Art

Mina's art teacher is impressing me. Somehow I pictured Kintergarden art class as construction paper and paste turkeys or something. However, Mina is coming home and talking about perspective and horizon lines and such. So school isn't a complete waste of time.

She was playing "artist" last night. She did this neat little mixed media piece with clay, water colours, and Christmas stationary.

Arbitrary Thoughts

Rebekah's always good for an interesting thought now and again. She was talking about how white trash people have a similar look that goes far beyond mullets and acid wash jeans. She believes that their skeletal structures are similar. She talks about such things as eye shape and placement and stubbiness of fingers. She theorizes that even when a person gets the glamour treatment that can't shake the "white trash" look they were born with and goes on to site Sheryl Crow as an example. I don't guess that it is too far fetched. If over time enough people breed within a select group they'll start developing characteristics that are unique to that group. That's how we got all the "races" in the first place. And if you mix the degenerative effects of alcohol and drug use during pregnancy you seal the deal.

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Belle and Sebastian are coming to St. Louis in November ... on a meeting night ...

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Mina wants to go on a picnic. Once upon a time I would say "no problem" and grab a ratty old blanket and a plastic grocery sack full of cold cut sandwhiches and go to the park. However that "Queer Eye" show has me convinced that I need a picnic basket and picnic china if I want to call myself a man.

--

The company I work for just secured a 3 million dollar contract. If there was ever a time to try to get a raise it's now.

--

Recently I've heard several people mispronouncing bestiality. It's "best" not "beast", people! Another commonly mispronounced word is menstruation. It's "menstrOOation" and not "menstration". And don't even get me started on "propitiatory". 99.9% of all JW's butcher that word.

Food Woes

When I get my first paycheck of the month we usually set aside $400.00 to cover our food and gas expenses for the next four weeks. The goal is $100.00 a week which we usually end up fudging the first three weeks leaving us stretched thin on the fourth week.

So on the fourth week it's time to get creative. Time for oodles of ramen noodles. Time for government cheese.

Time for deep discounts. We picked up three of these incredibly discounted Red Baron pizzas at the grocery store. Mind you, incredible discount does not equal incredible taste. I think they were practically giving them away to see if there was an interest in obscure flavours such as tomato and bacon, ham and pineapple, three cheese and garlic.

Time to scour the cupboards and pantry and pull out the unlabeled tins hiding in the back. I had some black beans and tortillas hanging around so I decided to make some burritos. Chicken, chorizo, and red pepper. Black beans, jalapeno, and onion. Roasted salsa. Here is the part where my tear ducts get tortured. First by the onions. Then by the roasted jalapeno peppers. Then by a habenero. And finally by chorizo. And here is the rub. Literally. Scrub all you want and the accumulated oils of it all will not come off your hands. So throughout the rest of the night and on into the morning everytime I rub my eyes I'm lit up all over again.

We've just got to make it to Friday...

Family Reunion

I went out in service Saturday with a Benadryl hangover. My year-long allergies start to perk up upon the onset of fall so I spend most of the autumn months in an antihistamine haze. We were working in the nice, new suburban neighborhood (of the we already have our paradise right here we don't need yours, thank you, variety) and along the road I saw a paper grocery bag filled with dead birds. Weird and eerie.

Afterward I ran home at noon to go to Rebekah's grandmother's house for their annual reunion. Needless to say these are generally a waste of Saturday. But, it's important to Rebekah so I go along. Her family is not very sociable. No one talks to each other. It's basically just sit around and drink beer, eat dinner, sit around and drink, build a bonfire, sit around and drink beer.



They rolled out the Sponge Bob pinata which I allowed Mina to beat with a clean conscience after reading that new Awake article. Rebekah's Mom butchered the cartoon characters name and kept calling him "Sponge Job".



I relax with beer #2 on the hammock.



This is Rebekah's cousin Tony with his two kids and his friend Krista.



Mina's feet at the end of the day.

Updates and Mic Hass

So we figured out the deal on the peanut incident. The cookie I ate was a chocolate cookie with chocolate icing. However when the sister made the icing she put a spoonful of peanut butter in with the icing. It was hidden and concealed. So when I took the initial bite the levels were too low to alert my peanut sense. It was only after I ate the entire cookie did the levels accumulate and throw my system into a frenzy. So now all my archenemies that read this know how to kill me.

Last night at the meeting I'm dozing because I couldn't find my Circuit Assembly notes so I really have nothing to contribute to the last part. So in a stupor I barely hear them announce my name for concluding prayer. This was a surprise. Usually I check the schedule and know about it weeks in advance; but this one slipped by me. My heart starts beating frantically and I spend the song trying to calm my nerves. I walk up and give a quick prayer thanking Jehovah for his creations and just barely get through it.

I caught the Folksmen on Comedy Central's repeat of Conan O’Brien yesterday evening. I like how they kept up the continuity of the the Mighty Wind movie going. The bass player was still dressed as a woman like the movie left off. After they played a song Conan did a brief interview with them. They stayed in character and Conan was tripping up trying to talk to them. It was the most awkward interview. Mighty Wind comes out on DVD in a few days and I will definitely be buying it. If it is anything like Guffman or Best in Show it will keep getting funnier with each viewing. (Waiting for Guffman is still the champ in my book.)

I woke up today and fired up the Mac and had six Spam e-mails containing the new "Swen" worm. Since my Mac is immune to such nasties I simply deleted the annoying e-mail messages. However, I started worrying about my network at work.

Television news is almost too comical at times. I watched it just a bit while waiting for the Simpsons to come on. It was ridiculous to see all these news reporters standing in the middle of some hurricane getting blown all over the screen and wind whipped and soaking wet. It's so over-the-top but I guess it makes for exciting TV or something.

Seeks Interesting Videos!

Well I'm working on having an event in October or November. I've been thinking of what I want to do with it. I haven't thrown a party since I was 16 and had a grad-party. I want to do some sort of video installation for atmosphere. I have access to the company Video Projector so I want to have some neat visual images projected on a wall. I was thinking something like these:

Lemongrass
Piano
Happy

So what I'm looking for will be merely decoration, no sound. So if anyone knows of where I could get a hold of a DVD (or even VHS) of some experimental/art film project or maybe even something else (obscure educational films, ancient home movies, cartoons, ? ? ?) to play, please comment or e-mail me. Any other ideas? Thanks!

Bible Study

One thing I've observed about the organization is that a bible study with your child is given less importance to a bible study with a random person you meet at the door. It's not so much an official stance as it is the attitude of some people.

Like when they throw out a statistic like "x amount of people come into the organization each day". I get the feeling most folks view that x as people outside the congregation. But it seems to me that a good portion of those "coming in" were already in as children of JW's. All organization figures that are given only take into account active publishers (baptized or unbaptized, they don't differentiate). The majority of children of JW's become publishers, maybe around age 10 or so. They may not go on to get baptized and make a commitment but they usually become publishers. I speculate the bulk of statistical growth is being provide by the progeny of Witnesses.

When asked to give a reason why "the end" hasn't come yet, some will point out all the growth that is still taking place. But if the growth is underage children of Jehovah's Witnesses wouldn't these skirt by destruction any way under the merits of their Witness parents? There is still tremendous growth but it may not be quite how people picture it.

So I'm not trying to dimish the importance of making return visits and conducting bible studies with outsiders. We conduct studies with people we meet in the ministry and maybe one a year become a publisher in our congregation. It still works and is necessary. I just think that bible studies with your children should be held in the same esteem. Perhaps they are viewed as easier so it's not as impressive or something. Or maybe they are so common that they lose there perceived value.

I guess the whole thing was brought on by the service overseer who visited our book study last night and pointed out that our bible study rate was "technically" with the national average. But he went on to say that if we didn't count the bible studies with our children then as a group we wouldn't have any studies. Why compare apples to oranges? The national average takes into account bible studies with children of JW's so it would seem right on target.

Not-So-Sweet Dreams

I really hate it when people tell me about their dreams. It bores me silly. So it is with great hypocrisy that I state the following:

Last night I dreamed that I visited an old teacher of mine who was afraid that I was there to kill her. "Why else would you return?" she asked me with tears in her eyes. I dreamed of being in the deep, dark service tunnels of the NY subway system where vagrants had made their homes and turned into silent shadows who tried to rob us. I dreamt of offering drugs to an addict and being chased up a flight of stairs and beaten. I dreamt of being in the rebuilt World Trade Center and was berated by a security guard when I didn't pay proper respect to the memory of the terrorist attack. Werewolves and vampires had chased me up a tree as my situation was being discussed on an alt-science AM radio show. And there were super heroes flying through the hi-rises fighting for domination.

And between each little scenario I awoke and stared at my alarm clock. The digital readout glowed bright read in near blinding luminance.

--

Growing up I regularly used to suffer from sleep paralysis. Somewhere between wake and sleep I would become paralyzed and unable to move. This was accompanied by a sinking feeling as if my brain was a bathtub drain and all my thoughts were water funneling down inside. I would become aware of an evil "presence" just outside of my field of vision. During these times I would try to fight it believing that if I could just move my foot I could break the spell. I would also pray frantically. It only lasts a minute but it is the most awful feelings I know of. In the aftermath I would be so terrified I couldn't go back to sleep for fear it would happen again. Fortunately, these episodes have diminished to maybe once a year. I used to think I was being attacked by demons (or aliens) and that horrified me. Now that I understand that it is a "natural" bio-chemical experience it's not so bad once the episode passes. But it still leaves behind this feeling of dread that is hard to shake.

--

I've often given thought to why we dream. As far as I know science hasn't provided a definitive answer. I speculate that perhaps it's our mind's way of organizing our mental hard-drive. Perhaps the brain is reviewing the day's experiences located on the desktop and moving them into to various file locations throughout the disk as well as chucking some of the events into the recycle bin.

Graduation Party

Lacey had her graduation party at Hartford park. I made a Potato and Chorizo Egg Custard with New Mexican Chile Sauce which is the only thing remotely "potluck" that I know how to make. I avoided all cookies like the plague not wanting a repeat of last weekend. I played some bocce until the brothers broke off for baseball so I retreated to a remote area of the park with my laptop and did some writing and editing on my novel. My father-in-law bought me a new cowboy hat after listening to me bemoan the loss of my original one some years ago. So I've been sporting it again new depression style. All the young boys had their skateboards out. Fresh off a viewing of "Dogtown and Z Boys" I grabbed one and tried to emulate those 1970's skate moves just about breaking my wrist in the process.

The whole day was kind of a downer because the band was supposed to playing until we couldn't get approval. It suckes to practice and practice and not be able to do anything. I talked to Brandon about renting the Wood River Round House for a night so that we could play before we start getting rusty again. I've been wanting to rent it anyway to have a dance party so I guess I'll just combine the two and do something in October. I might check around and see if Mikey Ramono wants to do a DJ set and then I could do one and then Mostly Minus could play. Rebekah can work the NA drink bar. It could be fun...but I always worry that some kid will do something stupid and their parents will get all hot at me because it's my event. I don't really know any of the kids around here to know who to invite so I'll end up just relying on giving the girls in my hall some invitations and telling them to pass them out as they see fit. That's scary.

ATMOS 206

To an extent our new song is done. I think I could tweak it some more; but, I'm ready to move on to other things, at least for the time being. It is definately my favorite so far as it is closer to the type of music I listen to. To sum up: girls and guitars. Rebekah gets to share the writing credit because she came up with the melody and really helped me to lay out the whole thing. Plus she kills the vocals. All of them. I have a big smile on my face.

Kool-Aid

After seven years of marraige you run out of things to talk about to your spouse and end up debating the minutia of pop-culture in effort keep the lines of communication open. In my relationship Vh1's "I Love The 70's and 80's" series have been a godsend for this reason.

Last night we got on the subject of Kool-Aid. Some families live and die by Kool-Aid. You open their kitchen cabinets and the little packets spill out from overflow. They are seldom without a fresh pitcher in the 'fridge. The children's upper-lips are always decorated with a Kool-Aid mustache. We are not one of those families--12 packs of pepsi to the point of overflow but never Kool-Aid.

I grew up on Kool-Aid. So did my friends. Each family had their favourite flavour. My buddy Casey always had lime. My sister's friend Laquina always had what was referred to as simply "red" as if the colour indicated the flavor like my least favorite, "orange." At our house it was usually lemonade.

So why no Kool-Aid now? I can think of two things that make me cringe dealing with Kool-Aid. Bad memories that provide a critical Kool-Aid impasse. First, the ghetto girls in grade school that used to carry around baggies of Kool-Aid powder and sugar and spend the day dipping their immortally stained fingers therein and sucking them with an unnerving slurping sound. Disgusting.

The other event was when I was out in field service once. This lady invites us in by yelling from her living room bed. It is a basically a "Gilbert Grape" scenario with this chronically obese, bed ridden woman in a thread bare nightgown that revealed too much laying and watching Soaps. She looked like a puddle, a pancake, a flounder. Her fat son walks into the room and interupts, "Mama. Look I found a packet of Kool-Aid!" He waves it about gleefully. "Now I can dye my hair!" The mother proceeds to tell (yell at) him that they need to save it to drink and the son is protesting that he needs to dye his hair Kool-Aid green. Disgusting.

--

Rebekah helped me work on our new song last night. It's turning out to be a catchy pop-rock song like the later Lush albums. We even got the rad two-part vocal harmonies in there. I'm really happy with this one I can't wait to share it.

I had an epithany with my book. Yesterday I woke at 5:00am and the ending that I was struggling to weave together from various plot threads had materialised in my brain somehow overnight. The book is done. I just have to finish getting it down on paper.

Early Graduation

This article relating to early graduation on CNN sparked my interest because I graduated shortly after my junior year. It wasn't nearly as easy for me as the school in question is making it. I think during my Freshman year I got to looking at the school rule book and started working the credit graduation requirements and deduced that if I played my cards right I could get out after my Junior year. I didn't love school and couldn't wait to get out.

I ended up taking these brutal 7:00am advanced science classes for extra credits and barely awake, barely skated by with D's and low C's. I skipped the basket weaving classes in favor of the core requirements, reading, riting, rithmatic. By the end of my Junior year I had numerically met the credit requirements but I had to pick up a summer school government class to meet the academic requirements.

Afterward I entertained the idea of going ahead and doing my Senior year. The way I looked at it I could only go to school one day a week and still graduate after having met the requirements or I could just go to school for fun and fail all the classes or do an entire curriculum of home economics. But in the end I just decided to write a letter to the School Administrator asking for permission to graduate early. I was perceived as bit of a rebel at the time due to my publication of a pissy little journalism rag so I think they were probably glad to give me the stamp of approval that sent me on my way.

At the ripe old age of 16 I graduated out of public high school.

Picnic in the Park

Our Congregation was giving a going away party for two of our pioneers who are moving at the park. Mina is still sick so I was going alone. Today was such a beautiful day I decided to ride my bike the eight miles to the park.

Food was served and I had the misfortune of grabbing a cookie containing peanuts in some form. I have bad peanut allergies. Usually when I eat peanuts accidentally there is just a little discomfort or maybe I throw up. Nothing too dreadful. Well today was not normal. I started feeling really bad, really fast.

I jumped on my bike and rode back home which nearly killed me. My chest was tight and my skin was itchy. My heart was pounding furiously. Finally, I made it home and grabbed my emergency asthma inhaler and took some puffs hoping that it would go away. It didn't.


Rebekah decided to go out shopping with her mother so I found myself home alone and quickly feeling worse and worse. So I called Rebekah to let her know I was driving to the hospital. I should have called an Ambulance; but it felt like overkill. I could barely drive and almost hit a pedestrian and then ran a stop sign and almost hit another car.

Upon making it to the emergency room my face had turned ghost white and my arms were bumpy and red. They checked my breathing and rushed me to the back where they started an IV and fed me some benadryl and some epiniphrine They plugged me up with some O2 and administered a couple albuterol breathing treatments.

I've had this allergy all my life and the only other time it landed me in the hospital was the very first incident as a small child. Usually it's no big deal; I can't fathom why this time was different. Usually when I bite into something I can tell it has peanuts in it and spit it out. This time it was only after I had ate the whole cookie. But even when I've had experiences like that it didn't almost kill me.

At 6:30 I was released from the ER and Rebekah came and took me home. I have insurance but I'm still set back $75.00. But I guess $75.00 is worth it to be alive? There was a couple seconds when I was worried that I wouldn't get to finish my book.

In retrospect it would have really been nice if they shoved a breathing tube down my throat. I still have to write something like that for my book and it's so much easier to use real life experience over what you read about. I don't like to fake it. The good is that I got a nice ER experience in my head for a couple of parts. I was sleepy because of the drugs they were giving me but I still tried to pay attention to the sights, sounds, smells, and feelings.

Mostly Minus; September 14 @ Hartford Park; 7:30p