Monday, July 24, 2006

Infestation

Yuck!

Our house is plagued with tiny flies.

They started appearing about a couple of weeks ago and we couldn't figure out where they were coming from. It was very sickening because we could only guess that Mina had left some piece of food somewhere in the house that was breeding flies.

Blech!

However we never could trace the origin of the little insects. We did notice that they were generally appearing in the bathroom which was strange because there was absolutely no source of food . . . or so we thought.

I kept figuring they would go away but since they looked like they had gone from being house guests to permanent residents I checked the Internet to try to figure out the problem.

I think they are drain flies that breed in plumbing; laying eggs in the film that collects inside of bathroom and kitchen pipes. We also been suffering from slow drains so that lead me to believe that we had some gunky organic something or other in our pipes that they were feeding off of.

Gross!

On Sunday I did what I could to clear the pipes with an auger which is always a digusting task. After that we boiled pots of of water and poured them down all the drains in an effort to kill the eggs and larva. I need to go to the store still and buy some foaming drain cleaner to try to clean out the food source. This may be a "rinse and repeat" type of affair so I may have to try again if the situation does not clear up.

I hope you weren't eating while reading this.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

Storms

On Wednesday night I had just grilled a couple of burgers and we had sat down to eat when we heard a storm brewing outside. So we went outside and the sky was crazy and everything was blowing and some tree branches were flying. We had the TV on and it didn't say anything about a tornado so I felt comfortable standing on my porch and watching. Rebekah had went around lighting candles However the wind really started picking up and slammed against the tree across from us and I heard it crack so we went to our basement. We lost power.

After the storm was over we went outside and there were tree branches and limbs down everywhere Since we don't have any trees we just had some that blew into our yard but we had one big one hanging on the wire that goes to the street-light in front of my house. Our neighbor came over and climbed on our roof and cut down that the limb and then we cleaned up our yards. Rebekah and I then drove around the neighborhood picking up branches where we could. But it was incredible there were many, many trees knocked down.

After it got dark we went home and did our best to try to sleep in the sticky heat. It wasn't a very good time to lose power with it being the hottest weather of the year. At about 5:30am our power came back on. At the time little did we know how fortunate we were to have power. As I drove to work Thursday I was listening to the radio news and they were saying that 450,000 people were without power in the St. Louis area. Bad news especially on a day that would have a heat index rating of 115. We had no power at our office so after I did some running around and cleaned up around building I went home.

Friday was the same scenario with power out nearly everywhere. At around 4:00 another storm blew through and hit some of the areas that the last storm had missed this monster did produce a tornado in another part of our county. Rebekah and I had tickets to Les Miserables so we left and tried to find somewhere to eat dinner but couldn't due to everything being closed. So we just headed to the theatre getting there about an hour before hand. The Lounge was open so we went there and ordered some chicken tenders and fries.

After Les Miz we drove to Wal-Mart back home to get a few items to eat over the weekend. Wal-Mart's parking lot was dark. When we went inside many of the shelves were empty. There was no meat, no fruit, no dairy products, no frozen foods. Another couple had been searching for C and D batteries which there seem to be no more in the area. Strange.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

I've Got An Idea

I've been in the spirit for two days now and it just feels good to be firing on all four? six? howabout seven cylinders. I'm just glad to be feeling positive.

Over the weekend I spent some time working on an article for a friend's newsletter. I chose the topic of giving to the poor and was just absolutely floored about how much I have missed the point of many, many scriptures. I wish I could share them right now but all things in time. But needless to say I was absolutely mortified by my personal failures.

And really what rotten people Rebekah and I are. We talk about simplifying our lives by going from 60 television channels to 40. Don't get me wrong . . . it's a start but how very sad.

So really I was looking at ways to help out and really I'm so detached with the world around me that I had no idea where to start.

But I needed to start somewhere - even if it isn't the best thing I chose to sponsor a kid from Compassion International. Now I'm not looking for praise like I did anything extraordinary. It is only $32.00 a month and compared to the amount we spend each month on eating out or television or Internet it really is pathetic and so much less then what Jesus is asking:

“If you want to be perfect, go sell your belongings and give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven, and come be my follower.” - Matthew 19:21

So I sponsored a girl from Guatemala named Marisol. (Rebekah and I had written a song about a little mexican girl named Marisol so that is why I selected her.) It's nothing big - nothing that will save the world - but it is just a start because I couldn't live with myself one more day without doing something somewhat righteous with my money even if it is a drop in the bucket.

When I speak of "starts" there is something starting in my mind - a little germ of an idea that has just put a perpetual grin on my face. I'm going to be praying about it and see if it can get legs - that is if my Fathers blessing is behind it. It's simple and a little silly, maybe even foolish - crazy - insane - ridiculous - but since my God called the foolish things of the world he will just have to deal with nutters like me and our feeble attempts to promote His Kingdom.

"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong." - 1 Cor 1:27

Oh boy . . . I'm excited.

Your pal,

Anthony

Monday, July 17, 2006

Praise

I'm feeling OK - mentally. (Physically my stomach is hurting.)

Today seems to be starting out as one of those days where I should just stay on my knees cause I keep wanting to pray.

Thank you Father for every good gift you have given me. Thank you for your mercy. Thank you for not giving up on me.

Yesterday Mina and I went to eat and then went to the store for some groceries. It was a nice time. She is getting a lot more pleasant these days. Is it growing up or training?

Rebekah and I have been giving lots of spiritual attention to Mina. I'll read a Bible story to her before I go to bed. Rebekah has been reading out of the Gospel of John with her. Admittedly their study is a little more in depth. Rebekah tells me they looked up some information together on the Pool of Siloam. We have enjoyed saying a nightly prayer together as a family and praying before meals.

Really though we are just trying to plant a seed and water it and so God can make it grow. (1 Cor 3:6)

I hate to keep harping on the past; however it just amazes me how different things have become. We used to hardly ever pray together. Now it is our habit and we even pray in public before meals whereas before we would've been too embarrassed. Also with personal Bible reading - it used to be like pulling teeth to stick to a Bible reading program but now it just such a welcomed part of our lives. Again with studying God's word with Mina we could never seem to get a routine of doing it once a week and now it is more or less nightly.

I know when the Elders disfellowshipped me they assumed that my spirituality would suffer. They actually told me as much. They were so wrong. I guess it is that they cannot imagine any relationship to God without the Watchtower Society. But as I told them in one of my judicial meetings I feel like I'm tapped directly into God through his son Jesus. So whether I'm worshiping here or there I'm still in contact with my heavenly Father. As it is written:

"Nevertheless, the hour is coming, and it is now, when the true worshipers will worship the Father with spirit and truth, for, indeed, the Father is looking for suchlike ones to worship him. " - John 4:23

And I don't say this as if I'm looking for justification. It is more of joy, peace, and happiness that I feel like sharing this morning.

Again,

Thank you Holy Father. Thank you for this powerful work you are doing in my life. Thank you for allowing me to come to know you through your son Jesus.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Back On The Horse

"It doesn't matter whether you're selling Jesus or Buddha or civil rights or 'How to Make Money in Real Estate With No Money Down.' That doesn't make you a human being; it makes you a marketing rep. If you want to talk to somebody honestly, as a human being, ask him about his kids. Find out what his dreams are - just to find out, for no other reason. Because as soon as you lay your hands on a conversation to steer it, it's not a conversation anymore; it's a pitch. And you're not a human being; you're a marketing rep." - The Big Kahua

I just read that quote from an article "The Gospel: For Here or to Go?". I haven't seen that movie but I would say that that quote really captures my old door-to-door ministry with Jehovah's Witnesses. It was all about the sales-pitch.

Really when you look at it the Service meeting that I attended was nothing more than a sales meeting. You learned similar tactics that were taught at any multi-level marketing seminar. You are told to smile, take a personal interest, look a person in the eyes, call them by name. But all this was geared toward distributing magazines or studying a book.

As I began becoming more and more disillusioned with the Watchtower Organization I slowly dropped the sales pitch. After finding out that the Awake! magazine had been used in the past to support a political obligation to the United Nations I stopped offering the magazines. When people began to notice I would simply say, "I'm trying to use the Bible more." Through my personal Bible study it began to be harder and harder for me to reconcile some of teachings of the Watchtower Society with what is said in the Scriptures. The result was that I was no longer comfortable offering "home Bible studies". It was also getting to the point that despite that positive aspects of the Organization I couldn't in good conscience bring somebody into it.

Those circumstances caused me to lose the sales-pitch aspect of the ministry. At that point I really had no agenda other than to get out and get to know people. What was interesting was how much my ministry opened up. I wasn't selling a product I was just there to share a thought, a scripture, a prayer. It was neat to begin offering prayers right on the door step of an intial call or maybe just give a hug to a stranger. (Most Witnesses that I knew where timid about praying with a person even after many weeks of Bible study sessions.)

I'll say this that I finally started to find joy in the ministry. I was becoming more productive - not in selling but in sharing and feeling. Not everyone was receptive but I did get to contact some really nice people in the work. And then I got disfellowshipped from the Organization and my field ministry activity came to a grinding halt.

On Sunday I went out in the field ministry work for the first time since being removed from the congregation in April. No time sheet, no tie, no magazines - just me and a Bible. I mainly wanted to touch base with some of my old return visits. The first house I went to was put up for sale and appeared to be vacant. At the second house the lady was asleep.

At the third house I knocked and there was no answer. Next door there was a boy watering plants on his porch. I felt the spirit nudging me to go next door. The boy tells me, "She's over here." So I go next door and the lady I wanted to call on was next door watching these neighbor kids.

It was kind of an awkward introduction because I had to explain why I was missing for the last few months. I tried to explain that I was no longer representing the denomination of Jehovah's Witnesses. She asked me, "Who are you with now?" I paused and said, "well I guess I'm a Christian."

We had a nice little chat by way of catching up. She related a little problem she had with having to deal with a squabble between her daughter and another relative. We went to the book of James and I shared some verses about how dangerous our tongues can be. We also looked at Galatians about manifesting the fruitage of the spirit such as mildness and self-control. I concluded with a prayer.

Since this woman isn't able to get to a church on Sunday she said she was happy that I return. It felt really positive to get out and get some face-to-face time with individuals to be able to try to offer some assistance and a prayer. I'm not really a good teacher but I love shepherding.

I don't really know where I go from here but I'm eager to find out.

--

I've started re-reading the Christian Scriptures again, this time in the King James Version. It is a really difficult version to read but the plus side is that it causes me to have to slow down and really concentrate on what is being said.

Friday, July 07, 2006

May 15, 2006 Watchtower

A couple of people have written to me questioning about the Society's new teaching regarding the "cities of refuge" alluded to in my last Blog entry. I wrote:

"I honestly wept over a recent Watchtower study article that presented a new teaching that the Cities of Refuge in the Hebrew Scriptures represent the organization and not Jesus' life-saving sacrifice. When they reject or downplay the basis for forgiveness by what basis can they be forgiven?"

This was reference to the May 15, 2006 Watchtower study article, "Are You Prepared For Survival?". It was studied by the congregations of Jehovah's Witnesses in mid-June. The whole article presents what I feel is an idolotrous image of the Organization. While faith in God and Jesus is given token mention in regards to salvation the primary thrust of the article is that in order to be saved you need to be active in the Organization as illustrated from the following quotes:

"Just as Noah and his God-fearing family were preserved in the ark, survival of individuals today depends on their faith and their loyal association with the earthly part of Jehovah's universal organization."

"Sticking close to and staying active with one of the over 98,000 congregations of Jehovah's Witnesses will help us prepare ourselves for survival."

Now when I spoke of an updated understanding of the "cities of refuge" that comes from paragraphs 11, 12 which I will quote in full:

"To survive the end of the present system of things, we must do more than believe that it will be destroyed. We must exercise faith, taking full advantage of God's provisions for survival. Of course, we need to exercise faith in the ransom sacrifice of God's Son, Jesus Christ. (John 3:16, 36) However, we do well to remember that only those actually inside Noah's ark survived the Flood. Similarly, the cities of refuge in ancient Israel provided protection for the unintentional manslayer only if he first fled to such to such a city and then remained inside it until the death of the high priest. (Numbers 35:11-32) In the tenth plague upon Egypt in Moses' day, the firstborn of the Egyptians were killed, but those of the Israelites were spared. Why? Jehovah had instructed Moses: "They [the Israelites] must take some of the blood [of the Passover lamb] and splash it upon the two doorposts and the upper part of the doorway belonging to the houses in which they will eat it. . . . and none of you should go out of the entrance of his house until morning." (Exodus 12:7, 22) Which firstborn among the Israelites whould have dared to ignore such God-given instructions by going outside a house marked with the blood splashed on the two doorposts and the upper part of the doorway."

"We therefore have reaason to think carefully about our personal situation. Are we actually inside Jehovah's arangement of spiritual protection? When the great tribulation strikes, tears of joy and thankfulness will stream down the faces of those who have sought such protection. For others, there will be only tears of sorrow and regret."

For starters it is upsetting to see the flippant way that Jesus sacrifice is treated. It is mentioned briefly and then kicked to the way-side to focus on the salvation through being inside the organization.

In the 11/15/95 Watchtower article "Stay In The "City of Refuge" An Live!" it identifies faith in Jesus sacrifice as the antitypical modern-day city of Refuge saying:

"What is the antitypical city of refuge? It is not some geographical location like Hebron, one of the six Levite refuge cities and home of Israel’s high priest. Today’s city of refuge is God’s provision for protecting us from death for violating his commandment about the sanctity of blood. (Genesis 9:6) Whether willful or unintentional, every violator of that command must seek God’s forgiveness and the cancellation of his sin through faith in the blood of the High Priest, Jesus Christ. Anointed Christians with heavenly hopes and the “great crowd” with earthly prospects have availed themselves of the benefits of Jesus’ sin-atoning sacrifice and are in the antitypical city of refuge.—Revelation 7:9, 14; 1 John 1:7; 2:1, 2."

So evidentally the May 15, 2006 Watchtower presents a change view. It is now implied that the modern-day city of refuge is the organizational arrangement of Jehovah's Witness that one needs to stay inside of and thus gain salvation. (It is interesting that the Watchtower does not come right out and present this as a new understanding. Lately they have subtly introduced new ideas without the fanfare that used to come with "new light".)

Sadly too the Society totally presents a warped view of the Passover. The focus of the Passover observance was on the lamb and the blood of the lamb which represented Jesus. However the Society spins the account so the focus is on the staying in the house, a small detail, which once again it implies to be illustrative of staying active within the organization. We must keep in mind that it was the house that was sanctified by the blood of the lamb and not the other way around.

I hope these comments helped to answer your questions. Thanks for reading.

Update - I scoured the 2006 CD-ROM to see if this was indeed a new teaching. References in the 60's, 70's and 90's (95 Quoted Above) have the antitypical City of Refuge being salvation through Jesus. However, the earliest reference in 12/1/1955 Watchtower seems to paint a different picture equating the City of refuge to some extent to the organization saying:

"What is the antitypical city of refuge today? As the typical refuge cities were cities of the temple servants, including the high priest of Jehovah, the antitypical city must be Jehovah’s provision for protecting us from death for violating the divine covenant concerning the sacredness of blood by our coming and remaining under the benefits of the active service of Jehovah’s High Priest Jesus Christ. That provision of protection is to be found with Jehovah’s theocratic organization of his people."

"Likewise those fleeing to the Christian’s city of refuge may not be idlers within the New World society. They must show an appreciation of the divine mercy to them and keep in touch with the remnant of the “royal priesthood” and especially with the High Priest under whose covering they find protection. They must not be burdens, drags, on the New World society, retarding its activity, draining away its spiritual prosperity. They must learn a trade in that organization, and in view of the divine obligations laid upon it the only “trade” suitable within that organization is to learn to preach the Kingdom message and declare the “day of vengeance of our God.” (Matt. 24:14; Isa. 61:1, 2) This makes the time within bounds fly by most happily before Armageddon in praise of Jehovah and it results in salvation both to the refugee and to others."


Thus this seems more of a case of reverting to a previously held viewpoint. This progression in the light of God's word is what the 12/1/81 Watchtower refers to as "tacking". "By maneuvering the sails the sailors can cause a ship to go from right to left, back and forth, but all the time making progress toward their destination in spite of contrary winds. "

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

4th of July

Here I am this morning on my day off from work. I'm drinking orange crush out of a glass bottle and nothing much beats soda out of a glass bottle.

I'm typing this and I don't know if when I'm done I'll just "save as draft" or "publish". These days I tend to just write things for myself and keep them private.

But I was looking at my Blog and it has been empty so I'm needing to write something to those that are reading. Maybe I'll let you know that I'm still alive and kicking and growing.

I have been writing about things that I'm studying or learning or experiencing in my walk with God. (I'm learning some awesome things. I can remember as a JW being so excited about "new light" that came every so often. Now every day that I open the Bible I am hit with revelations big and small. God feeds me in a way that no man ever could.)

This morning I'm looking at God and wondering, "What is this work that you are doing?" Because for those of us who are seeing what is happening in the church system it definately appears like something is up.

It feels strange to talk to individuals who feel that they were called out of apostate church systems. Was I called out or kicked out? Perhaps I was like Lot and dragging my feet in Sodom so God pulled me out.

But as one of Jehovah's Witnesses I look around and see how brothers and sisters are walking way or taking a stand against apostasy and being kicked out of the organization.

I have to ask my Father, "What is this work that you are doing?"

You then suddenly realise that this is just happening with Jehovah's Witnesses but this is happening all over Christendom. People are seperating from a church and choosing to be THE CHURCH by millions. (Talk about an increase!)

It does appear that the problems within the different church systems are becoming more and more manifest and their waters are drying up.

I honestly wept over a recent Watchtower study article that presented a new teaching that the Cities of Refuge in the Hebrew Scriptures represent the organization and not Jesus' life-saving sacrifice. When they reject or downplay the basis for forgiveness by what basis can they be forgiven?

Father, how long can such gross disrepect and idolotry stand?

I have prayed that judgment be held off to give my brothers and sisters time to wake up and repent. I just don't know if there is enough time. I guess I need to hope and pray. I only hope that the organization's apostasy will continue to worsen just so it will become intolerable for Christians to be a part of it.

I guess more than anything I get the feeling that we are being positioned for the final act in this age old drama.

Shortly the entire system of false Christianity will come crashing down. Thank God that he has shown us the way to the wilderness - the place of protection under the wings of God and here we are fed the bread that came down out of Heaven.

The wilderness the place of protection, the place of refinement, the place of preperation.

Holy Father Keep us safe, make us strong - keep us awake and ready.

My love to all the Saints scattered about in the dispersion.